The Middletown Press (Middletown, CT)
In tough times, staying positive at Whitney Center
“We have not been able to see them since this started, for about eight weeks now. I can’t babysit for my 8-year-old granddaughter. And I miss my sister, my nieces, my nephews. It’s the physical contact with my family, hugging grandchildren.” Blanche Agostinelli
Like the rest of us, the residents at Whitney Center are tired of being isolated in a lockdown, weary of the state-mandated restrictions and sometimes anxious about contracting COVID-19.
But because those residing at this senior living and life care complex in Hamden are older than the general population and some of them have preexisting health conditions, they have to be extra-cautious. And of course they occasionally get nervous.
However, Georgia Jennings, one of the four residents I interviewed last Wednesday afternoon at the center, said: “I don’t feel anyone here has a sense of dread or panic; not even close to that. I think we feel secure here.”
The words “secure” and “safe” were used more than once during my conversation with Georgia and Steve Jennings and Blanche and Al Agostinelli.
Those four had agreed to talk with me about life at Whitney Center in a time of a public health crisis. Maria Freda, a neighbor of mine who is Whitney Center’s director of resident services, arranged for them to be interviewed after I asked her how people are doing there.
It’s easy to see why the residents feel safe, given the extensive precautions that are being taken. When I arrived, wearing a mask as required, a health care worker in the lobby asked me a series of questions (“Have you traveled abroad recently? Have you had a fever or chills or muscle aches?”) and then took my temperature. I understood that all four of the residents also would be wearing masks and I would need to sit at least six feet away from them.
At the outset I asked them if anyone living at the center had tested positive for the coronavirus. I was told three residents had done so and two of them have fully recovered. One of the three, a 101-year-old woman, died. But all three cases were traced to private duty aides from outside the center who were hired by the residents or their families.
Georgia Jennings acknowledged “it’s scary” these days. “But the staff has excellent communication with us, so it’s very reassuring. They are very transparent.”
Whitney Center usually is a highly social place with residents gathering to eat together in the dining room and engaging in many group activities. But now they have their meals or groceries delivered to their rooms and all social activities have been suspended.
These four residents are learning to adapt, to do Zoom conferences and to emphasize the positive things in their lives — especially spousal companionship.
The Zoom talks have stood in for a group that used to meet in the dining room for breakfast ever Wednesday morning; for the women’s group meetings; and for gatherings of the men’s group. There are even Zoom “house parties.”
“Every Sunday night we Zoom with our sons, our daughter and our grandkids,” Al Agostinelli reported. “Two of our sons are out in Boulder, Colo..”
But Blanche Agostinelli said it hurts not to see their two offspring who live nearby. “We have not been able to see them since this started, for about eight weeks now. I can’t babysit for my 8-year-old granddaughter. And I miss my sister, my nieces, my nephews. It’s the physical contact with my family, hugging grandchildren.”
She said she also misses her outings to the Hamden Public Library.
“I’m feeling tired about this prolonged need to isolate,” she added. “My mood is not as sanguine as it used to be. And of course I take that out on my husband!”
“I didn’t notice,” said Al Agostinelli with a little chuckle and probably a big smile behind his mask.
As for what he misses, it’s the Sunday night classical music concerts that Whitney Center held.
“I want to go out to dinner,” Georgia Jennings said. “I want to go to a movie. Sometimes I have felt trapped.” But she and her husband often drive out to Brooksvale Park nearby to walk the trails.
“We were supposed to be in Europe now,” she added. But they canceled that trip, as well as the annual family reunion at Lake
Winnipesaukee in New Hampshire. “We’ve gone there every summer for 35 years. But we decided it just felt scary; all those people coming from all over the country. All those people, touching things.”
But it’s the little things they miss, too. Georgia Jennings named two at the top of her list: “I miss being spontaneous and I miss my Starbucks decaf soy latte!”
“I think the most we can hope for,” Blanche Agostinelli said, “is that we all stay healthy.”
She has COPD (chronic obstructive pulmonary disease), so she is particularly careful about taking proper precautions.
But three of them have had those little scary moments recently, as have most of us. Blanche Agostinelli had a “runny nose” but then she realized it was only because of an allergy.
“I had the same thing,” said Steve Jennings. “You wonder; you analyze your symptoms. After a couple of days you realize you’re OK.”
“I was coughing and sneezing for a couple of days,” said Georgia Jennings. “Then it went away. But during those two days I thought: ‘This is it.’”
Toward the end of our conversation Georgia Jennings said, “I feel like I’m in the last chapter of my life and I want to live fully until I die. I love living. My life is really valuable to me.”
Her husband, Steve, said this: “We have a great deal to be thankful about. Remembering what you’re thankful for at least once a day is a really important way to keep your attitude positive and to influence other people.”
Two summer campers enjoy time on the water at Camp Argo in Orange, which will not open this summer.
by taking temperatures each day. He said if a child had two elevated temperatures on successive days, they would have to be tested for COVID-19 and, if positive, they and all the children in the group, as well as the counselor, would have to quarantine at home for 14 days.
Counselors were to wear face masks in the hot, humid weather, making their jobs less appealing and campers would have had to wash their hands after every activity, Nevis said, with items such as soccer balls being disinfected after each use. Camping groups would
have to stay 6 feet apart, he said.
Though he was planning on opening until just a few days ago, Nevis said some other hurdles and potential problems, besides the changing dates, came under consideration, including:
⏩ Potential liability if a camper were to get COVID-19 even if it was not caught at camp. He said the insurance companies are not sure how to handle that potential scenario since it’s new, and as a small, nonprofit the camp, it couldn’t afford lawyers to defend itself.
⏩ Vague requirements from the state on social distancing
and other safety measures.
⏩ The possibility of not being able to acquire the correct cleaning/disinfectant supplies because of shortages, as well as the high cost of using so many supplies.
⏩ Running the risk of sullying the camp’s reputation should a camper develop COVID -19 from any source, even outside of camp.
“It’s a snowball effect,” Nevis said. “We don’t want any parent upset at our program.”
Nevis said there are also many situational worries, such as if siblings in separate groups see each other across the field and run for a hug or high-five. That raises a concern of not being able to keep groups totally separate, he said.
“We have made this difficult short-term decision to ensure the long-term mission of Camp Argo,” Nevis said in his correspondence to parents, going on to write, “Unfortunately, these are not normal times and we cannot ignore the overwhelming concerns due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Ultimately, we considered the health & safety of our campers, staff and our community when making this decision.”