Stop arguing over what makes a good country and be one

Wednesday was a day of conflicting emotions. Like many of you, I am shocked, saddened, angered and numbed by the events that transpired. It was a historic day for divergent reasons.

In the morning we learned that Georgia elected both its first African-American senator and its first Jewish senator, and I was proud of our country. Regardless of party, I am proud to know in America as the Rev. Raphael Warnock (soon to be Sen. Warnock) so eloquently stated, an “82-year-old’s hands that used to pick somebody else’s cotton went to the polls and picked her youngest son to be a United States senator.”

That is the America I want to leave to my son. An America where in one generation, a family can go from picking cotton for someone else, to having a U.S. senator in their family. An America where in one generation an immigrant’s son can become president of the United States. An America where my son’s grandfather could move here with $17 in his pocket and build a better life for him and his family. Then, Wednesday afternoon, my emotion shifted. My pride turned to tears and to anger.

The hallmark of American democracy has always been our peaceful transition of power. The fact that we do not change administrations by war or strife. Recently, it has been the new president flying in by helicopter and the old president flying out. What happened Wednesday is not something that should happen in America. It was not something I ever thought I would see in my lifetime. We saw what happens when we allow hate to fester. We saw what happens when we allow misinformation to go unchecked. We saw what can happen when leaders put themselves above the good of the country.

This day was the first time since my grandfather died in 2004 that I was happy he was not alive, so he didn’t have to see this. It seemed the America that he taught me to love was dying. But when I woke up the next day, my resolve steeled. I looked in the mirror and thought about what I could have done to contribute to those events. I think everybody should do the same.

We need to ask ourselves questions. Do I ever share information on social media without verifying its authenticity? Do I ever share information that is designed to inflame rather than to inform? Do I ever shut down and stop listening to someone’s ideas because they are from a different party, ethnicity, race, age, or just plain different from me? Then, we all need to resolve to not let hate win, just as we did after 9/11.

You may know that I am interested in Stoicism. Stoicism holds many tenets, but we at this time need to understand sympatheia, or the belief that we are all connected. What harms one of us, harms all of us. We also need to share their belief in doing good from where you are, meaning we may not all have a platform to share our ideas, but we can all help in some way. Wednesday, we saw on full display the worst of America. Today we need to commit to showing the world the best of America.

We need to help each other. With everything going on in this country, there has never been a time in my life when so many are in need. Reach out to the Beth-El Homeless Shelter, West Haven’s WHEAT, Westies Care, or any of a number of great organizations.

Commit to examining your own beliefs and seeing how we can all be better and work together to strengthen our community.

I have spent this past year trying to grow in regards to race relations and I invite you to join me on that journey. Join the Milford BLM Book Club. You can register by emailing MilfordBLMBook@yahoo.com. Whatever it is you choose to do, we need to as Marcus Aurelius said, “Stop arguing over what a good person is and just be one.” We all need to be better. The world we saw on display Wednesday is not the world I am willing to leave for my son or your children and loved ones. Join me in making that commitment.