The Middletown Press (Middletown, CT)
Communities rally to help family after man’s death
ORANGE — Trevor Van Hise touched many lives in his years as a children’s coach and an altruistic businessman helping others in Milford, Orange and West Haven.
Now, the community is showering his family with donations and love following his untimely death.
Van Hise, 48, who appeared healthy, according to his wife, Denise, didn’t feel well Saturday, went to lie down and never woke up. He is survived by his wife of 21 years and their three children: Jenna, 20, James, 18, and Jackson, 10. The family is awaiting autopsy results.
Trevor Van Hise didn’t have life insurance and was the sole main installer at the couple’s small business, Carpet & Tile by the Mile in Milford. Denise Van Hise was the front person.
A friend and neighbor, Denise D’Onofrio, started a GoFundMe campaign to pay for a funeral and other expenses for the family and donors are coming through in a huge way — in two days the fund collected more than $21,000. The family lived in Orange, Denise Van Hise grew up in West Haven and Trevor Van Hise grew up and Milford, graduating from Jonathan Law High School in 1991.
“I’m totally blessed and I just think it’s amazing,” Denise Van Hise said of the outpouring in her family’s time of need. “This community is just amazing — they came together,” including, “my Westies.”
D’Onofrio described her neighbor in the GoFundMe post: “Trevor was a wonderfully energetic and friendly neighbor. The loss is deep and will be felt by many for a very long time.”
Friends said Van Hise was social and could hold a conversation on any topic, including current events.
“He was a friendly, talkative and all-around great guy,” D’Onofrio said.
Sandra Briggs, owner of the new Milford restaurant Hair of the Dog 128 Bridgeport Ave., had known Trevor Van Hise since high school and they remained friends, so she will be holding a fundraiser for the family from 3 to 9 p.m. Feb. 3, giving half the proceeds to the family. The night will include a 50/50 raffle and she is looking for prizes to be donated for a regular raffle.
“He was funny, easy going. He was totally healthy and working,” Briggs said. “Just hearing that he didn’t have life insurance, I just wanted to help in any way we could because they’re a really good family.”
Van Hise was so immersed in coaching children that the GoFundMe states: “If you have a child who played a sport for Amity or Orange, they were likely coached by Trevor at some point. Trevor coached all of his son’s sports teams from football to basketball to baseball. And if he wasn’t coaching, he was on the sideline or in the bleachers cheering on his kids and yours.”
When it came to coaching, Van Hise “had a special gift,” and treasured the thankful letters he often received from parents, Denise Van Hise said.
Lori Grabowski said Van Hise was instrumental in helping her son, Douglas Grabowski III, after Douglas lost his father five years ago unexpectedly on Christmas night at age 43.
“He withdrew from everything in his life including baseball, which he loved,” Grabowski said. When Douglas was put on Van Hise’s Little League team, he had “very little confidence in anything,” she said.
“By the end of the season with Trevor’s guidance, mentoring, coaching and caring ways, Douglas emerged from his shell and was asking to pitch by the end of the season,” Grabowski said.
Van Hise awarded Trevor “Most Improved” for the season and “that gave Douglas the confidence to really soar,” she said.
“He (Trevor) went above
and beyond just out of the kindness of his heart,” she said of the coach. “He (Douglas) still plays baseball today and holds Trevor very near to his heart.”
A child athlete himself, Van Hise coached youth baseball, football, basketball and Amity Pop Warner.
“He just connected with the kids,” Denise Van Hise said. “He loved working with kids.”
The couple met in 1998 when Trevor Van Hise, already in business, came to install carpet in an apartment she shared. It took a while for him to get her phone number to ask for a date — her roommate’s
boyfriend was hesitant. But they finally connected and had been together ever since. Even in those early days Trevor Van Hise was a giver — when he met his future wife, he had just donated all the carpet to his church, she said.
“He’s always just been a giving person,” Denise Van Hise said of her late husband. “He loved what he did — he loved his business and he loved what he built.” He left for work early and came home late.
To donate outside of GoFundMe, checks can be mailed to Denise Van Hise c/o Carpet & Tile by the Mile, 554 Boston Post Road, Milford, 06460.