Openness about infidelity costs man

Dear Abby: I ended my 24year marriage after learning my wife, in addition to several one-night stands, had an affair with a married couple for nine years.

We were unable to agree on parenting, finances, health, fitness, diet, religion, politics and more. I worked hard, but I was a present and active father, attending all games, concerts and activities, as well as coaching and teaching my children in music and the arts.

In the pursuit of helping other men deal with the grief of infidelity, divorce and mental health, I began sharing my experience on a social media platform. My oldest child now refuses to speak to me. I’m hurt, but I respect her decision. I will not silence my story. Is there a way to build a relationship with this adult child?

Disappointed Dad in the Midwest

Dear Dad: Once she is willing to concede that there are often two sides to every story, she may mend fences, but it won’t happen until she is ready, and you cannot force it.

Dear Abby: I have noticed so many obituaries omit where the person worked. A lot of people worked at the same places for many years. Coworkers and acquaintances I’m sure would like to pay respects to those who have passed.

My late wife was a nurse for almost 40 years and came in contact with many people. The outpouring of love from family, friends and acquaintances from her social and work lives was overwhelming and heartfelt. They say if we have memories of our loved ones touching others’ lives, they live on in our hearts forever.

Let families know to include the work history of their loved one in the obituary, particularly if they had jobs dealing with the public.

Remembering Well in Ohio

Dear Remembering:

Because the obituaries one reads in the newspaper are costly, it’s possible the writers try to keep them brief in order to save money. I am, however, printing your helpful reminder for those who may need it.

Dear Abby: I was wondering, even though we call our priests “Father,” can I also call him “Dad”? Why or why not?

Pondering in the West

Dear Pondering: I posed your question to Father Guy Gurath, a longtime friend in the Milwaukee archdiocese. He chuckled and told me this is a standing joke among Catholics, who have been known to refer to the rectory as the “Home for Unwed Fathers.” (!) He went on to say the formal answer to your question is no. Calling a priest “Dad” is likely to offend some. He suggests the correct terms “Father,” “Reverend” or “Pastor” be used. Thank you, Father Guy.