Mom wonders when to stop correcting daughter
Dear Miss Manners: When should I stop correcting my daughter’s manners? She is now 18, and when we are together in public or in private, I sometimes correct her (gently and discreetly, of course). I hate to do this, as I feel it is rude to notice aloud another’s manners, but on the other hand, I feel it is my duty to remind my daughter how important it is to treat others with politeness. She doesn’t seem to mind and sometimes even thanks me for reminding or teaching her. You may be thinking that if the girl has not learned by age 18 how to behave, then it is a little late. She is very wellmannered generally, and I am proud of her. But since she spends most of her time with her peers, who have not been brought up as she has, she falls into bad habits, and I would like to take advantage of our brief times together to rub off on her in a good way. Is setting an example the best way now, or would I be doing her a disservice by not reminding her? Gentle Reader: One is never too old to be mothered — and teaching etiquette is part of the job description. Miss Manners finds setting an example, along with gentle, discreet reminders, proper. If your daughter is receptive to, and even grateful for, your help, why question it? Particularly as she is at an age where she may soon be seeking employment and more formal social situations, she will appreciate the efforts even more when her impeccable manners put her in a far better position than her apparently lackluster peers. Dear Miss Manners: What is the appropriate dress for the step-mother of the bride to wear to the wedding? Gentle Reader: Anything that does not upstage the mother.