Teen questions if parents are really ‘social drinkers’

Dr. Wallace: My parents claim to be “social drinkers,” which helps them justify to the three teenagers in our family (and I’m the oldest one) why we should not sample alcohol at all until we turn 21. I can say that our parents are both responsible people who never seem to have their occasional drinks (mostly red wine) impact their lives in a negative way.

But late this summer, in August, while on vacation we camped out in one of our nation’s famous national parks for four nights. Our parents met another couple they clicked with, and by the third night, all four adults were chugging a lot of wine. My siblings and I were surprised since this was not “just a glass of wine with dinner” kind of situation. It’s true that our parents did not drive a vehicle those four days and they slept off their consumption pretty well from what I noticed.

But when we returned home, my parents went back to their very same previous routines and there has been nothing that has had me raise a single eyebrow. But those few nights in the national park have me wondering if my parents are truly just social drinkers or something more ominous. What do you think?

— A Curious Teenager, via email

A Curious Teenager: Gathering what I could from your story leads me to believe your parents are indeed social drinkers and responsible people. The one time that you ever even had cause to raise a doubt occurred on vacation at a campground that did not involve driving a vehicle.

Many teens would gladly trade places with you as I have heard many rough stories over the years involving parents who drank decidedly too much and too often and then would lash out at their children and their spouses.

WHY DOES GRANDPA STILL SMOKE CIGARETTES?

Dr. Wallace: My grandpa lives with our family, and he smokes a lot. He smokes so much that he has a lighter for every place he smokes. He keeps one in his car and he has one at the construction office he works at. He’s a supervisor there and I understand he’s planning to retire in two years. He also keeps a lighter on our back patio porch since he lives with our family now ever since grandma passed away last spring.

I’ve also noticed that next to each of his lighters is an opened pack of cigarettes. It’s like he does not want to run out of cigarettes wherever he is. So, the other day when I came home from school early I went out on our back patio to see our family dog. After I fed him, I saw grandpa’s lighter and cigarettes. I was curious, so I took one out of his pack and lit it up. I then tried to smoke it, but I mostly just choked. I took about three puffs but they were small since I couldn’t really smoke correctly. Anyhow, I finally put the cigarette out and put his lighter back exactly where it was.

I then walked down to the public park about 10 houses from our home and I threw the rest of that cigarette in a trash can so nobody would find it. I went home and brushed my teeth and changed my shirt so I would not smell like smoke. I’m 15 and will turn 16 in late January. What I want to know is why grandpa still smokes those filthy, stinky cigarettes after all those years. They are horrible and stink really bad.

— His ‘One and Done’ Grandson, via email

His ‘One and Done Grandson:

Your grandfather many years ago pushed past the foul smell of cigarettes and his propensity to choke on the smoke at first. And his reward for pushing ever onward? Nicotine addiction. Your grandpa is addicted to nicotine and he craves that substance more than he dislikes the smell of the cigarettes and the smoker’s cough he likely has by now.

Kudos to you for recognizing that you really dislike cigarettes and that you are now committed to being “one and done” with your consumption of cigarettes. It’s not good that you tried one, but at least you have learned your lesson and know that you won’t want to ever repeat the mistake.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift. com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.