“Look at it. Learn. Then, discard it.”

Galasso-Vigorito: It is difficult to move forward with your life when you keep the past in the present.

Late one afternoon, I pulled my car into our driveway and I saw my daughter’s face in the front living room window. “What are you doing home?” I asked when I walked through the door.

My daughter was reading a homework assignment at the table. So I made my way into the kitchen and continued, “I thought you were going to your friend’s house after school.”

Turning to me, she answered, “Maybe tomorrow, mom. She was busy today.” Together, we conversed a bit about her school day. A highly motivated student, my daughter explained that she took a quiz in her social studies class and received a grade of 85.

She handed me the quiz. Then, I noticed a bright orange sticky note attached to the paper. On the sticky note, my daughter had written, “Look at it. Learn. Then, discard it.”

I snapped to attention and thought, “What at a wonderful lesson for life.”

Are you holding on to past hurts? Is there something that happened in the past that you can’t get beyond?

Maybe you’ve had countless disappointments. You might think you have fallen short. Or, you could’ve made some unintentional mistakes. And, perhaps, you just can’t let go of what happened to you.

But it’s difficult to move forward with your life when you keep the past in the present. We spend way too much time worrying about what transpired long ago. So, instead of being critical toward yourself, mulling over who hurt you, or allowing yourself to feel like a total failure; rather, do as my daughter did: “Look at it. Learn. Then, discard it.”

You might have gone through things that are unfair. Yet, don’t use past negative situations as justification to cause you to give up on yourself, on your heart’s dreams, or on your happiness and plans for the future. There are some things that we can do nothing about. So stop robbing yourself of peace, stability and joy by being tormented by discouraging thoughts. Look beyond the, “should haves,” or “could haves.” For in hindsight, we can always find something that we could have done differently.

Here is an idea: If you’re having trouble quieting negative thoughts of the past that could be swirling around in your mind, try this approach. Imagine that your friend is the one who is in a challenging situation. What suggestions would you give to him or her? Now, write down on paper that advice and, perhaps, apply it to your circumstances.

Then, go forward with gladness. Set your mind on a mighty vision for your future.

As opposed to thinking, “I’m in an impossible situation,” Go forward with gladness and say, “With God all things are possible.” (Matthew 19:26).

Rather than believing, “I’ll never get well,” Go forward with gladness and state, “With His stripes I am healed.” (Isaiah 53:5).

Instead of continually uttering, “It’s not fair,” Go forward with gladness and declare, “God will restore twice as much to me.” (Zechariah 9:12).

When you look for the good, you draw out the good. So, beginning with your own thoughts, let go of past hurts and disappointments to make room for the new, wonderful things that God wants to do for you and accomplish through you. You can overcome any situation, for God is saying to you now: “I am on your on side, and I still have a great plan for you.”

Hence, stand strong in faith and press on toward your goals. That’s what a friend of mine did when she faced constant rejection in her career. My friend is a talented performer. Though through the years, she struggled. Once, she trusted a small group of individuals, and they unscrupulously blindsided and wronged her in a business venture. She had spent many years on this endeavor, and the deceit hurt her tremendously. However, rather than holding a grudge, my friend said with faith, “God, I forgive them.” After that, she thanked God that He was at work in her life, and she continued pursuing her goals.

My friend pressed forward and didn’t give up on herself or her career. Then, an opportunity came across her path, and she auditioned to be a part of the cast in a touring musical. Weeks later, she was informed that she was not chosen. My friend could have easily become bitter and disheartened until she quit. Yet, rather than grieving, harboring frustrations and questioning, “What did I do wrong again?” my friend had great faith. “I trust that God knows what’s best,” I recall her saying calmly. “He must have something else in mind for me ahead.”

She had little resources or connections in the industry. But limitations or social conditions do not circumscribe individual potential. Each day, with a strong work ethic, my friend kept doing her best. Trusting in God, she had great expectations for what was to come.

A short time afterward, out of the blue, my friend heard that the choreographer of that same musical resigned. A performer since childhood, she quickly sent in her impressive resume. Next, she contacted the office and then set up a meeting with the director.

Well, instead of just being a part of an ensemble, my friend was hired to choreograph the entire show! Moreover, all the rehearsals would take place close to her home. Thus, her family life would remain close and intact. That one opportunity brought my friend national exposure and she was launched into a successful career.