Villa guest confronts illegal drug use

DEAR AMY >> This past summer, my best friend of more than 30 years, her 9-year-old daughter, her new husband and others, rented a villa in the Caribbean. I was invited to join the group.

My friend has always been very self-centered. I’ve always accepted this about her.

On the fourth day, I was asked to move into the room with the child. Originally my friend said that I may have to do this for one or two nights, but not half the trip. When I tried to mitigate the situation calmly, she pounced. They all ganged up on me after that.

However, the worst part of this situation is that while there — in a foreign country — with a child in the house — cocaine was bought, possessed and consumed. My friend had a history of this and had assured me in advance that this would be a “clean vacation.”

I ended up watching a movie in the room with the child while the other very high people were right outside the window (very uncomfortable). I checked in to a hotel the next day and was basically outcast after that.

I feel betrayed that she lied about my accommodations and put me (and the child) at great risk possessing a Schedule II narcotic in a foreign country. I am a business owner and cannot take chances like that!

She and I own property together in her home state on the other side of the country. I have asked to be bought out and have not really discussed anything since. She is bothered by my “silence,” but I feel like the most prudent and kindest thing I can do is remain silent.

And I know it is fruitless to speak to addiction. Your thoughts? — Sad About My Friend DEAR SAD >> Well, your friendship is over. I’m not sure why you would choose to stay silent about this long friendship’s demise, other than the anxiety over being bullied by her.

“Kindness” in this context is not staying silent, but speaking your mind, because at this point, your kindness should be directed toward yourself. Your silence here translates into passive acceptance of reprehensible behavior.

You should contact her, re-state your issues with her behavior (including the drug use), and immediately take legal steps to extricate yourself from co-ownership of this faraway property.