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something I haven’t. And since I can’t quite explain it at this very second, let me talk about how I’d love for others to have some. Yes, I am digressing, but I promise to return to my shortcomings and goals momentarily, don’t you worry.

Have you ever had to teach a teenager to drive? Yes, that takes patience, but I have that kind of patience. It’s what I’ve noticed while teaching her. No one else has patience. In the six months I’ve been teaching my daughter to get confident behind the wheel, I’ve noticed that there are either some truly impatient folks on the road or some with a death wish (all who make me call them names I shouldn’t). We live in a pretty small town I think, and for the amount of traffic we have I’ve seen people do things I’ve never seen even in the city (or New England and if you’ve driven there you know how aggressive people can be). Passing on the right, passing on the left to cross over to the right, stopping to ask if we are waiting for traffic and when we say yes they PASS us on the left just to take a right. This is many times them cutting out into traffic in front of others (a motorcycle even did one time). So who needs patience? Well, I might need it a little in that situation, but I never need it in traffic or when I’m behind someone on the roadway. Life is life, traffic is traffic, lines of people are traveling, red lights are red, stop signs mean stop, emergency vehicles intertwined mean caution… what exactly gets accomplished by speeding through, past, tailgating or cutting off ? Nothing. Maybe a car length is gained. I have never understood it, and I certainly don’t get it now that my child is driving. What if it was their child? It once was, I imagine.

For the record, my father taught me to drive. I’m glad, because I drive defensively ( as the phrase was always told to me). I have taught my kids to be considerate but cautious (of ‘insane drivers’); we are respectful on the roadways but watch out for the unexpected. Patience is something that I teach on the road; we all need to be calm, to think clear, to have tolerance and show it to others; to drive in bad weather and get somewhere safely. The new drivers, the elderly. Have patience for them. What if it were yours?

Okay, what you’ve been waiting for… back to my own challenges. I can attest to the fact that my patience has been built by having children. I might have said this before, but my father once told me that he was shocked that I had more than one child because I didn’t have much patience. True. True. When I was a kid and even a teen, I had no patience for anything; getting snarls out of my hair (yes that’s still an issue lol) and even trying to be good at everything. Then, later on in life I can admit to having zero patience when I was alone with three babies and one needed her bottom wiped, while one was breast feeding and the other one pooped up one end down the other- at which time some sort of patience had to kick in finally (and it came in the form of an L.O.L., before LOL was popular). Patience continued after that quite regularly, and had to, because that one who pooped up both sides of her body did that all the time (mostly when it was time to go somewhere and she was dressed in the cutest, pinkest, most perfect outfit).

Now that I’m even older, my need for patience comes as an answer to my desire to fix things quickly, tackle things perfectly the first time; to wait for an outcome during the work-in-progress is agony. Especially when I want my TLC home to be perfectly updated, my clutter to disappear in a single day of sorting and for pain to pass yesterday. Patience in traffic isn’t the same as patience with ourselves, our own life situations, or our loved ones. Having a calm when the wanted results aren’t achieved yet is something that’s developed. It’s something that needs working on and which isn’t completely resolved after the slow car in front of us moves out of our way. It’s a process.

This year I’m looking forward to the goal, but sitting with the imperfections, with the calm-the waiting, hoping that the impatient people behind us can see their own impatient behavior as a barrier to their happiness. I’m getting back to My One Word. It’s such a simple (not always easy)way to stay focused. I urge you to check out MyOneWord.com and pick one for 2018. I also urge you read testimonies and then share your One Word and journey with me this year using #familymatterswithamber on INSTAGRAM @momgluck3 . For more on my previous One Word’s and common sense parenting tips visit us at our new website www.familymatterswithamber.org where you can see the all new and archived stuff.