CT visit brings COVID, double lung transplant
ANSONIA – Carl Werden and his fiancee, Margaret “Ty” Williams, had hit their happy spot living in a house they joyfully remodeled together in South Carolina just three blocks from the beach they walked to almost daily.
But then Werden, 57, traveled to Connecticut in late June to visit his daughter Delaney, 20, in Wallingford and COVID-19 got its grip, leaving him perilously close to death in Danbury Hospital, and then, after recovery, in need of a double lung transplant.
“It was pretty much touch and go, and I didn’t think he’d make it at one point,” Williams, 52, said. “I’m just glad he’s here.”
Werden got the successful transplant at Boston’s Brigham and Women’s Hospital, was released Dec. 11 and is on the mend physically, although he will never be quite the same.
While the two are navigating their new life of doctor visits, medication and lifestyle changes together like any strong couple, they are facing a huge financial obstacle, as Werden can no longer work as a contractor — the only career he’s known — because he has to be careful not to get dust or other debris related to the job into his lungs.
Delaney Werden has established a GoFundMe campaign to help her father pay his health insurance premium, medication copays and more. She said her father grew up in the Sandy Hook section of Newtown and they lived in Southbury for many years.
“It just breaks my heart for him because he’s always been such a provider,” Delaney said. “I feel so bad that he can’t do that for himself.”
For the last seven months Williams has been staying at her daughter’s house in Ansonia — and now, so is Werden — and the couple can’t go back to South
Carolina anytime soon, as he has weekly doctor appointments in Boston, then it will move to monthly, then every six weeks. At that point they can consider going back to South Carolina between appointments.
“It taught me to be thankful for everything,” Werden said. “I’m thankful for my fiancee, my family, the person who donated the lungs.”
The couple met four years ago through the dating app Plenty of Fish. Williams said they had the same interests and she loved the movie “Alien” — he had pictures of aliens on his social media page. Their first date was at Copper City Grill in Ansonia.
“After that first date, I just knew we were going to be together. … He’s really laid back, openminded, fun,” Williams said. “After my divorce, I pretty much had a list and he checked all the boxes.”
They became engaged two years later on Halloween 2018 — they both love the holiday — and in November of that year they moved to South Carolina after having visited one of his brothers there twice.
Carl Werden said they bought a house that was such a “wreck,” he and Williams filled a 50-yard dumpster but together they made it their cozy home. The couple click so well, they managed to work on the house harmoniously from 7 a.m. to 9 p.m. every day, Werden said.
If that doesn’t say love, what does?
“She’s a nice person, easy going, we just get along well,” Werden said.
The couple have canceled two wedding dates because of COVID-19 restrictions limiting gatherings and don’t have a new date set yet, but they are longing to return to South Carolina.
“I just feel like this is something we have to do. I know it’s going to get better,” Williams said. “We just want to get home,
walk on the beach, get a golf cart and live happily ever after.”
Werden came to Connecticut June 20 and fell ill the last week in June, leading doctors to believe he contracted the virus on the ride up, even though he wore a mask and was so careful that he even sanitized his keys after every stop.
It was June 27 when Williams noticed her fiance was getting worse and called Delaney Werden from South Carolina, telling her to take Carl Warden to Danbury Hospital “no matter what he says.” Delaney said her father had fatigue, shortness of breath, vomiting, failing motor skills and shaking.
When Werden arrived at the hospital he was diagnosed with COVID-19 and pneumonia. They twice wanted to put him on a ventilator but he declined because he had heard so many virus victims perished while intubated.
Instead, he rode it out with lots of oxygen, one night being told he might not make it when his oxygen dipped into the 50s and his fever was 104.3.
“I don’t remember the first two weeks,” he said.
Delaney Werden, an only child, said Danbury Hospital saved her father’s life, and for that she is eternally grateful.
“He’s an amazing dad. He’s the most selfless person you could meet in the entire world,” Delaney Werden said. “He’d give you the shirt off his back.”
After two months in Danbury Hospital, Werden was sent to Hospital of Central Connecticut in New Britain for rehabilitation, including physical therapy, as he was not able to walk. Before COVID, Werden was a healthy nonsmoker who didn’t take any medications.
It was there Werden learned the virus damaged his formerly healthy lungs to such an extent that he would need a double lung transplant.
He was to taken by Life Star helicopter to Brigham and Women’s Hospital, where he underwent a lung transplant once he could walk a certain number of feet within a time frame. When he arrived, Werden hadn’t walked in three months.
The surgery took 10 hours and he learned it was going to happen with little notice at 6 p.m. the day before.
Although everything is not the same following the transplant, Werden said he’s feeling good and getting stronger each day. He is still undergoing physical therapy at his temporary home in Ansonia and getting regular blood tests.
He now takes insulin three times a day because of the high dose of steroids he was on for six months. He walks with a cane at home and walker outside. He has some dietary restrictions now, including not drinking orange or grapefruit juice.
But Delaney Werden said her father doesn’t need oxygen, and can ride a bicycle.
“Some days I want to push him, but I know I can’t,” Williams said. “He tries his best.”
As for work, it remains a weight, as Carl Werden doesn’t see anything in the near future. The couple put their savings into the house, Werden doesn’t qualify for Social Security because he was an independent contractor, and Williams’ career ended because of degenerative disc disease and a failed surgery, she said.
Williams formerly worked as an appeals and grievances representative in the health care industry.
Carl Werden needs to pay his insurance premium, car insurance, car payment, house bills, medication copays and more.
Delaney Werden said her father is the hardest worker she’s ever met — and always quick to help others. She remembers from her childhood that he worked on roofs during snow to earn a living.
So far, she’s raised about $11,000 of a $50,000 goal. Williams said they have had some generous help from his brothers and sisters for fees associated with the South Carolina house.
Williams said she told her fiance before COVID that there would always be “bumps in life,” and this, she admits was a “big bump,” but certainly it can be conquered.
“I learned as always (through his sickness), you can’t take stuff for granted. You can’t dwell on what you could have done. You have to look forward,” Williams said.
Carl Werden has a message for the people who refuse to wear masks in public places.
“There are people who think COVID isn’t real and if they’re healthy there’s no problem. But that’s not the case because I was healthy before,” he said.
Delaney Werden said of her father, “He’s the toughest guy I know. … We’re extremely close. He’s my best friend.”