Changing diaper causes friction at baptism

DEAR ABBY » My sister-in-law “Brenda” often takes it upon herself to change a baby’s diaper during social gatherings with family. She never bothers to ask the baby’s parents if it’s OK to do this, and they never solicit her help. For years, I found it a bit strange, but never said anything.

Some time ago, my inlaws and immediate family were at my son’s baptismal party. Several babies frommy wife’s side as well as my own were there. My wife’s relatives aren’t well-acquainted with mine.

During the festivities, my wife’s niece — who was still in diapers — appeared to have a full load in her back side. Her parents were in another room. Without informing them of the issue or asking permission, Brenda took it upon herself to change the diaper. The child’s mother walked into the room and began to loudly scold Brenda for doing it without her consent.

After the party ended, my family couldn’t understand why the child’s mother became so upset. They thought she was some kind of nut for reacting the way she did. I fully understand why the mother became upset. What’s your opinion,

Abby? — Strange in the East

DEAR STRANGE » What your sister-in-law did may have been fine with her own family, but for her to have changed the diaper of a child whose parents she didn’t know well (and from whom she didn’t have permission!) was inappropriate. I don’t fault the mother for being upset. Rather than blame her for reacting the way she did, it’s time someone explains boundaries to Miss Brenda.