The Oklahoman

Mom’s long-distance advice isn’t what teen wants to hear

- Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby. com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069. Send your queries to “My Answer,” c/o Billy Graham,

DEAR ABBY: I am 17 and dating a 16-year-old girl. My mother lives a few states away. Every time we talk she tells me to spend less time with my girlfriend. It always seems like she’s trying to break us up. Please give me advice. I want her to want me to be in the relationsh­ip I’m in and to let me stay with her.

— Teen in Love in Pennsylvan­ia

DEAR TEEN: Regardless of what you may think about what your mother is telling you, she is not the “enemy.” She may be worried that the more time you spend with your girlfriend, the less you will have to devote to your studies, sports, friends, etc. — all of which are important at your age. The two of you need to talk further about this, so there are no misunderst­andings or hurt feelings.

P.S. Because your mother lives out of state, I assume you are living with your father or some other relative/guardian. It might be enlighteni­ng to know what the other adults in your life think about the amount of time you’re spending with your girlfriend. Perhaps you should ask them.

I am struggling to adapt to our accelerati­ng technologi­cal world. When I remove myself from the rapid informatio­n cycle of the internet and social media, I feel the world is passing me by. I have tried to find a balance, but the ubiquity of technology and our cultural reliance on the internet leave me feeling like I have only two options at any given time —connection or disconnect­ion —and neither one feels entirely healthy to me.

This isn’t the first case of technologi­cal advancemen­t leading to rapid cultural change and a sense of dislocatio­n, but at the current rate, it may be the most extreme. This is to say nothing of the increasing presence of artificial intelligen­ce in our lives. Do you have any advice for maintainin­g one’s humanity while remaining culturally relevant in our increasing­ly technology­dependent world?

— Floating in the Digital Age

DEAR FLOATING: Just this: Try harder to find a balance, because if you are constantly online, you will be swamped. Sometimes we must disconnect and enjoy the “real world” without the constant interrupti­on of the latest news cycle. Trust me. You won’t miss much because the informatio­n will find its way to you.

DEAR ABBY: What is the proper way to handle the situation when you catch the host of a party double- or tripledipp­ing into a bowl?

— Ick! In Larkgo, Fla.

DEAR ICK: That’s easy. Refrain from consuming anything from that bowl.

DEAR READERS: Happy Mother’s Day to mothers everywhere. This includes birth mothers, adoptive and foster mothers, stepmother­s, grandmothe­rs who are raising grandchild­ren, and dual-role dads. Orchids to all of you for the love you give every day.

UNIVERSAL UCLICK

There is only one sin that God cannot forgive — and that is the sin of refusing His forgivenes­s! No matter who we are or what we’ve done, God still loves us, and He promises to forgive us — totally and completely — if we will only turn to Him in repentance and faith.

Is this hard for us to accept? Yes, it is — because it’s not the way we usually treat each other. If someone hurts us in some small way or fails to be friendly to us (for example), we might resent it — but over time we’ll probably overlook it or forgive them. But if someone deeply hurts us or cheats us or lies about us, then we have a much harder time forgetting about it or forgiving them. The greater the hurt, the harder it is for us to forgive.

But God isn’t this way! Yes, we have offended Him by our sins — in fact, we’ve hurt Him far more deeply than we’ll ever hurt anyone else. And yet God still loves us, and He yearns for us to realize what we’ve done, and turn to Him in repentance and faith. God takes our forgivenes­s so seriously that He sent His Son into the world to die for our sins.

Don’t carry your burden of sin any longer. Turn instead to Jesus Christ, and in faith give your burden to Him. God’s promise is for you: “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteou­sness” (1 John 1:9).

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