Family’s disapproval stops woman from opening up

I’m a pansexual female and open about it with my friend and my brother. The rest of my family is super Christian. I tried to bring up the “gay” word, but they’re all against it and have strong opinions.

I want to feel accepted for who I am, and not keep anything from them. When I should tell them —or should I just not tell them at all?

According to Wikipedia, the definition of pansexuality is “the sexual, romantic or emotional attraction toward people regardless of their sex or gender identity.” While it may be empowering for you to disclose this information, it should be clear to you that your family —with the exception of your brother —is not open to hearing it. However, you are free to live your life, so live it and be happy. You do not need their approval and you shouldn’t let their approval —or lack thereof —affect how you live.

My husband and I own a coloring business. We color unicorns and rainbows and other pictures. They are beautiful and sell well.

Recently, my motherin-law started begging us to let her join our team. Abby, I’m sure she would do fine and that she could color within the lines, but we do not need any help.

My husband suggested hiring her to run errands, but I doubt she would be satisfied with that. I love our company as it is now.

Because you love your company “as it is now,” do not hire your mother-in-law to fill a job that doesn’t need filling. Instead, you and your husband should explain that “the company” doesn’t need another colorist right now, and see if you can help her find a part-time job elsewhere if she needs money.

We recently lost a beloved family member. My question is, how long do I wait before we deactivate his email and Facebook accounts? Some people say immediately, or wait a year. Others have said to leave them active indefinitely.

Do I need to send a message to his Facebook friends in advance?

There are no hard and fast rules covering a situation like this. Some people deactivate the accounts immediately. Others leave them live indefinitely. However, you might wish to post a comment to the effect that, “For those friends who might not know, our beloved ‘Joe’ passed away on (date of death).”