Neighbor wants to reach out after tragedy
DEAR ABBY: I have just learned that a neighbor lost his wife. She died during childbirth. As a wife and mother, all I can think about is that newborn baby boy and his two beautiful sisters. It breaks my heart. I have never spoken to him, but I did chat from time to time with his wife.
I would like to offer help to the father, but I don’t know how I should approach him. Please offer me some advice.
— Grieving for Them
in Hawaii DEAR GRIEVING: Reach out to your neighbor by writing him a short note saying that you heard the tragic news and would like to offer your condolences. Offer the kind of help you are willing to give — perhaps meals for his freezer or child care if the need arises.
DEAR ABBY: My husband and I enjoy going to estate sales. Recently, we were shocked when we heard an estate sales representative ask an older lady if she could afford what she was looking at. The woman answered “yes.” As the woman was leaving, the estate representative asked her if she could search the pockets in her jacket! She said “yes,” and nothing was found on her. The estate sales representative followed up with, “You know how it is.” We were appalled, to say the least. We had been browsing right along with the older lady and saw nothing suspicious. Should we have said something?
— Gracie in New Mexico DEAR GRACIE: Since I wasn’t there, I can’t guess at what may have triggered the sales rep’s suspicions, but her treating a prospective customer in such a heavy-handed manner is surprising. I have seen wealthy shoppers at more than one estate sale who “dressed down” to enable themselves to get a better bargain. That said, I think you were wise not to intervene. To have done otherwise might have caused a scene and embarrassed the shopper even more than she already was.
DEAR ABBY: My parents are driving me crazy. About six months ago they opened a little store close to where we live. Every day since it opened, they have made me work with them, on the weekends as well as after school until 6 p.m., when Dad gets there. I’m tired of working there. They don’t pay me and are very strict. I want to tell them I don’t want to work there anymore, but I’m afraid they will punish me. What should I do?
— Driven Crazy in Illinois DEAR DRIVEN CRAZY: Your parents wouldn’t be doing this if they didn’t need your help. Please try to step up to the plate with less resentment. By being involved in the family business, you are learning not only responsibility, but also skills that will be valuable when you are older.
DEAR READERS: In the words of Rev. Martin Luther King Jr., who in 1968 was martyred in the cause of civil rights, and whose birthday we remember today: “We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope.”
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