Ex-boyfriend needs to give space to ill woman
DEAR HARRIETTE: I had a girlfriend for four years during college; we broke up about two years ago, and it ended badly. We are no longer on speaking terms. That being said, I will always care for her, and I like to hear that she is doing well.
Last week, one of our mutual friends informed me that my ex is sick. There is something wrong with her lungs, and she has been having trouble breathing on her own for the past month or so. When I first heard this, my heart hurt and my immediate reaction was to call her. I got no response, and then I wondered if it is my place to reach out. Under these circumstances, what is the right thing to do? FRIEND: I am sorry to hear about your exgirlfriend’s health challenge. It was kind of you to reach out to her during this time of need. It is also important that you not have any expectations about how she might respond. Given that she is ill, she may not be able to reach back to you even if she wants to. It could also be true that she does not want to reopen that door in her life.
Send her a get-well card and keep her in your prayers. You should not continue to contact her, though. Give her space. If you feel comfortable staying in touch with the mutual friend you saw, check in periodically to see how your ex is doing and if you could be of help. Don’t be pushy, though.
DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been invited to a wedding this summer in Rhode Island as my fiance’s plus-one. The wedding is an orthodox Jewish wedding, and this will be the first religious wedding I have attended. I am unfamiliar with Jewish wedding traditions, and I’m struggling with what to wear. I have done some research online about appropriate attire, but I am a little confused because some sites say I need to cover my shoulders and knees, but others say they just need to be covered for the service, and I can be showier at the reception. I don’t want to offend anyone with my dress. What type of outfit do you recommend I wear to this orthodox Jewish summer wedding?
— Orthodox Wedding
Attire, Denver DEAR ORTHODOX WEDDING ATTIRE: For traditional weddings in general, you should have your shoulders and knees covered. Indeed, many women wear sheer hosiery so that their legs are not bare. In terms of attire for the reception, it’s best if you wear the same outfit. Your goal should be to dress modestly. If you wear a dress that is sleeveless, keep your shrug or shawl on until you get a cue from other women at the reception that you are free to remove it. Sometimes women can bare their shoulders while dancing. Don’t be the first to try that out, though. Observe others and follow their lead. You may feel more comfortable staying modest throughout the event.
A suspense drama with a very interesting premise — which double roles seemed to only make more interesting — opened Friday.
“Blood Relations,” set in 1902, by Sharon Pollock, was staged at Carpenter Square Theatre, 800 W Main, with three actors in double roles.
The story begins 10 years after Lizzie Borden was accused and acquitted — but not in the (in) famous children’s ditty — of killing her parents with an ax.
Stirring up townspeople is the fact that the actress playing Lizzie in a stage production also is visiting the real Lizzie Borden in the home where the deaths happened in Fall River, Massachusetts.
In CST’s production, Brenna Betz and Corrynn Englerth co-star as Lizzie and The Actress, respectively.
Englerth was statuesque — and commanding — relative to the person she was playing, not only on stage, but in flashbacks of the actual Lizzie.
All of which could be confusing, but made sense given our tendency to make alleged criminals more glamorous in later treatments of their misdeeds.
Betz also was convincing and gave a nice neurotic undertone — of a person with secrets — to the real Lizzie. Betz then doubled as the Irish maid in flashbacks.
Greg Crall supplied a nice contrast as a married, well-intended Irish doctor, who is always on call and brings out Lizzie’s lighter side. Crall doubled as her attorney in the trial.
Barry Thurman was just sympathetic enough as the domineering, miserly father, who, despite his violent out- bursts of temper, seems to still love but not understand Lizzie.
Laurie Blankenship also struck a good balance as the stepmother Lizzie hates and calls a “fat cow.”
Michael Tull was believably obnoxious as the stepmother’s brother, making moves on the maid and urging the father to cut Lizzie and her sister out of his will.
Filling a final facet in the family equation very well was Ashley Bower as Lizzie’s older sister, getting out of harm’s way by going to the beach on the crucial day.
CST’s only inwardly, not physically bloody “Blood Relations” offering, was intelligently directed by Tom Cowley, with an excellent period set by Ben Hall.
The play, which leaves the “did she or didn’t she” question — and whether we sympathize with her if she “did” — ultimately up to the audience, is highly recommended.