The Oklahoman

Late bloomer worries he is being labeled a playboy

- Jeanne Phillips www.DearAbby.com

DEAR ABBY: I have never been married. I’ve been perceived as a "playboy" for many years now. I don’t mean to be, but when I sense the potential for a passionate romantic encounter with flowers, candy, champagne, pot (and an occasional Quaalude), the urge takes over.

I was never considered "hot" until I turned 50 and decided to get in shape. I had a hair transplant, a neck lift and lost 25 pounds. Shouldn’t I continue to enjoy this? I’m really loving it. But I worry about the comments about my age. I look about 38.

— Max in the Midwest DEAR MAX: If you are wooing adult women with flowers and candy, that’s the traditiona­l way of going about it. However, if you are using alcohol, pot and Quaaludes to render them so dizzy they can’t refuse your advances, it is considered rape — a prosecutab­le offense no matter how good you look for your age.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are pregnant, and we are arguing over the gender of the baby. We have wanted this child for a long time and had trouble conceiving. I won’t care if it’s a boy or a girl, but he is adamant that he wants a boy. He has even gone so far as to say that he will be disappoint­ed if it isn’t.

We find out the gender this month, and I’m not

sure how to prepare or if we should even find out. Help!

— Disappoint­ed in Ohio DEAR DISAPPOINT­ED: Many men fantasize about having a son, a "mini-me" to teach sports to, just as many women dream of having a daughter and what her first prom will be like or helping her to plan her wedding. When most couples have a baby, the first thing they do is thank God the baby is born healthy.

Please do not take your husband’s spouting off so seriously; it will pass.

DEAR ABBY: My good friend injured her back, so I offered to help out with chores and errands while she recovers. One of the errands was to pick up some groceries, which included items for a barbecue party. No problem. However, I later learned she threw a grand cookout on Memorial Day, complete with boat rides, jet skis, fireworks and tons of food— the food I picked up for her. The kicker? I wasn’t invited! Am I immature for feeling angry and left out? — Trying to Be an Adult About

This DEAR TRYING: I don’t think you are immature. You called this woman a good friend. Unless an important fact was omitted from your letter, your feelings are normal. The only "good friend" in this relationsh­ip appears to be you.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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