Suicide is perhaps the most misunderstood of deaths

September is Suicide Prevention Month. The Oklahoman’s Darla Slipke wrote a front-page story Sept. 2 on the difficult journey for family members and friends after the death of a loved one by suicide and where to go for help.

It is important to remember that suicide is not about wanting to die. It is about wanting to stop the pain.

Most helpful to me are the words of Ron Rolheiser, a Catholic priest from Toronto, who said suicide is perhaps the most misunderstood of all deaths. We tend to think that because it is self-inflicted, it is voluntary in a way that death through physical illness or accident is not. Rolheiser said this isn’t true.

“People die from physical heart attacks. Death by suicide is the same, except we are dealing with an emotional heart attack or an emotional fatality.”

The Toronto priest reminds us, “People die of illness and accidents all the time and all the love and attentiveness in the world sometimes cannot prevent death. We must recognize that we are dealing with an illness, which, like cancer or heart disease, can be terminal irrespective of every human effort to restore health. There are sicknesses that no humans can cure.”

Being with others who have had the experience is helpful for most. If you live in the central part of Oklahoma, Survivors of Suicide is a group that meets weekly at Crossings Community Church.

Survivors who live in an area where there are no support groups may find a good online resource is The American Association of suicidology at www.suicidology.org.

Dialing 2-1-1 offers a statewide, free, 24-hour phone service staffed by Oklahoma’s HeartLine that offers compassionate listening and available resources in your area.

If there are children in the family, call Calm Waters, 404-946-2264 or go online to www. calmwaters.org

There is hope and there is help.