The Oklahoman

House cleaner tries her hand at interior design

- Jeanne Phillips www.DearAbby.com Contact Dear Abby at www. DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

DEAR ABBY: I am wondering if anyone else has ever asked about this. I have had the same cleaning woman for three years. She does an excellent job and works hard. I got her the last six or seven of her clients. However, she has made little changes in the past when I’m not home.

For example, she reorganize­d a kitchen drawer and laundry room cabinet without first clearing it with me. Yesterday, when I walked into my laundry room, I noticed two pictures had been removed from the wall and rehung in my living room. Furthermor­e, she used three nails to hang them and left the first nail in the wall because she had made a mistake. I removed the pictures and returned them to their original spots. The three holes in the living room wall remain.

I live in an expensive penthouse. The holes are like bullet holes to me. This is not my apartment. I am a renter. In addition, I do not have the paint that matches, and I am not handy with spackle and painting. My cleaning lady is very sensitive. When I asked her to let me know the night before if she needs to cancel, I almost lost her for good. I had to call repeatedly, and I’m walking on eggshells now.

— Renter in Nevada DEAR RENTER: Sometimes it isn’t what you say but how you say it. Hang onto your temper while telling her she has created a problem for you.

P.S. Visit a paint store or home improvemen­t store and you may be pleasantly surprised to know that paint can be closely matched these days if you bring a small sample with you.

DEAR ABBY: I’m a 58-yearold woman, divorced for three years. I was in a loveless marriage for almost 20 years. Over the last three years I have lost 45 pounds and have started going to online dating sites. I’m attractive, so I get lots of attention. I post nice pictures of myself, nothing sexy. But the kind of attention I’m getting is not what I want. I’d like to meet a man and try to have a long-term relationsh­ip. Most of the men “say” that’s what they want, too. But to be honest about it, it’s not. How can I come across as a woman who wants an LTR and not a “friends with benefits” or a hook-up? I don’t sleep around, so those things just are not my cup of tea. What do I do?

— Lost in the Online

Dating World DEAR LOST: If someone wants to move your “relationsh­ip” to the next level before you are ready, you need to say you are not comfortabl­e in moving so quickly. It occurs to me that there are many kinds of dating sites, and you may be on the wrong ones. If you have friends who are also in the dating world, ask them which they use. Consider meeting suitable men the old-fashioned way — by being introduced by people you know and who know you well.

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