Schedule a sober sister sit-down soon
QUESTION: During the holiday parties, how much booze should you serve until you cut your sister off? How do you go about cutting her off without making her feel embarrassed?
CALLIE’S ANSWER: Help her out and let her know beforehand you might be cutting her off, so it isn’t a shock. Also, make sure it’s always just you two and not in front of others.
LILLIE-BETH’S ANSWER: Express your expectations in advance so you can ward off a problem before it starts. During the party, make sure you have alternative, nonalcoholic drinks that you can use to fill her glass. I’m sorry you have to ask this question, but you are responsible for the amount of alcohol served to your guests so it’s good you are on top of this early.
HELEN’S ANSWER: Discuss this with your sister ahead of time. Although it might be uncomfortable, she needs to know what you (and probably the rest of the family) is thinking. There are lots of festive nonalcoholic drinks you could serve to help the matter. Suggest them to her.
GUEST’S ANSWER: Christina Nihira, community volunteer: The holidays bring an extra level of stress particularly when family members celebrate together. The situation you described is challenging given the dynamics but possibly can be solved with some honest conversation. I recommend a chat with her in advance about your concerns. If she’s not receptive, all you can do is observe her behavior during the festivities. When things start to unravel, take her aside (in private) and again express your worries.
Another suggestion is just don’t serve alcohol. Have plenty of alternatives like a jolly punch and eggnog.
Ultimately, your sister is an adult. She must assume responsibility for her actions.