Teen chafes under dad's strict style of parenting
DEAR ABBY: I am a teenage girl in an average family. I started getting interested in LGBTQ+ and other social justice topics when I was in fifth grade.
Since then, I have realized that, among other things, I'm a lesbian, a liberal and an atheist. This wouldn't be a problem, but my father hates many of the things I am or stand for. He's an extremely conservative, Christian, gun-rights person, and he wants me and my brothers to join the military.
I have several mental problems, which resulted in me getting special privileges in school. I use them whenever I can, but it is never enough for him.
I have various restrictions on my use of technology, so I can barely contact my friends. Please tell me what to do in the meantime because college is five years away.
— Waiting in Virginia DEAR WAITING: You and your dad have very different outlooks on life, and that's OK. That said, you must live under his roof for the next five years, so be diplomatic and keep some of your opinions to yourself as long as possible.
You may think your father is heavy-handed in parenting you, but has it occurred to you that when he goes through your grade book, he's trying to make sure you know how to work all the problems in it? Placing restrictions on a minor's use of technology is intelligent parenting, at least for someone just entering her teens. Please try to cut him some slack. Recognize there is a bright future ahead of you if you concentrate on your studies to the best of your ability and buckle down now.
DEAR ABBY: My 32-yearold son, “Jerry,” wanted to propose to his girlfriend, but didn't have money for a ring. My husband offered him my original engagement ring, assuming for some reason (or maybe just not thinking) that my old ring didn't hold sentimental value to me, although I wore that 1/3-carat diamond every day for 32 years before getting a new, larger one.
After the ring was offered, I felt forced to let him have it.I got over my feeling of loss knowing he would use the ring.
Well, he didn't. He gave her MY ring, and then they went out and charged a nice-sized engagement ring that she selected. My original ring now hangs on a chain in her jewelry box. Should I ask for my ring back?
— Means A Lot in Texas DEAR MEANS A LOT:
Because your first engagement ring is not being used as intended and was only a place holder until your son's fiancee got what she really wanted, I see no reason why you shouldn't ask.