Real change starts with us
I'm an African-American pastor of a multi-ethnic church that is 70% white. One of my favorite times on a Sunday morning is giving everyone a moment to say hi to one another. Hugs, highfives, and smiles break out as the room gets louder and louder. The fun part is getting human beings who were born to connect and be social to stop after three minutes and refocus their attention to the front — to me. This was our Sunday world before COVID-19 introduced stay-at-home orders and the term social distancing.
I wish answering the race problem was as easy as three minutes on Sunday! It is not easy, but it is simple. We only have to want to be a part of the solution.
The death of George Floyd has awakened a desire for change in a large part of America who were formerly quite disinterested or passionately opposed to conversations like these. We have seen public demonstrations of solidarity where more whites are present than people of color. The reality of injustice and pain that many people of color have tried for years to communicate is now being heard at a greater level. What took so long for people to care? I call it ESD, Ethnic Social Distancing.
In America, we occupy the same spaces at gas stations, grocery stores and sporting events, but we rarely share dinner tables, life experiences and pain. This leaves us with the illusion of healthy integration until a tragedy happens and the opinions of our friends and neighbors
start flying across social media. It becomes obvious that we have at least two worlds with two histories. How will we ever mend? We must overcome ESD.
ESD leaves us to know one another by the stories on the evening news, our inherited beliefs and our distorted interpretations of our interactions with one another in public spaces.
My family and I were walking at Scissortail Park on Saturday and waved at a young white family that we did not know. Their little boy responded by leaning forward in his stroller and yelling, “Hi Friends!” In his mind, if we were waving, we must be friends. We all smiled as we enjoyed a brief taste of a world where skin color really didn't matter. This little buddy had not yet learned from life's ESD classroom.
As he grows older, he will do so in a world that is socially homogenous, unless his parents are intentional. If we truly want a different world, let's begin with our dinner tables, our beliefs and our hearts.