Weirder is better for new lineman
If Hayes can tackle rushers, Dolphins won’t care about his beliefs.
DAVIE — William Hayes has been with the Dolphins for a few months and he’s already fitting in nicely with his new teammates.
Here’s a man who believes mermaids exist and dinosaurs don’t. Aliens? Probably real. The United States’ multiple moon landings? Obviously staged. Hayes is as interesting as it gets in an NFL locker room and he’s not holding back. One of his first conversations with new buddies Cameron Wake and Andre Branch was about his unwavering conviction that scientists have faked every dinosaur fossil that’s ever been discovered.
“We ain’t really talked too much,” Hayes said. “They just told me to shut up. It was real quick. I tried to explain myself, but they said, ‘We ain’t trying to hear all that around here.’”
It’s going to be a fun season with Hayes, a defensive end and tackle, stirring up the most serious corner of Miami’s locker room. He’s got a lot of theories. His craziest one might be that Ndamukong Suh wants any part of these arguments.
“The next person I’m going to work on is Suh,” Hayes said. “Suh might be a little receptive to hear me out. He just likes to mess with me on a daily basis. I figure he’ll just tell me how stupid I sound, but at least give me a chance to explain myself.” Good luck.
Here’s what you need to know
about Hayes football-wise, just to get this out of the way: He’s a 32-year-old defensive lineman the Dolphins acquired for next to nothing in a trade with the Rams and he’s here on a one-year deal.
He’s got a reputation as a good run-stopper — something this team needs badly after setting a franchise record last season for most yards allowed — and he’ll play off the bench as long as no one ahead of him gets hurt.
He could be Miami’s No. 4 defensive end if first-round pick Charles Harris gets rolling quickly.
Hayes spent the first four years of his career with the Titans, then followed Jeff Fisher to the Rams.
He put up a respectable 34.5 sacks in five seasons before they dealt him to Miami in March. He’s suffered through a lot of losing, particularly with the Rams, where he went 31-48-1.
“I want to win — that’s the only reason I’m still playing,” Hayes said. “I want to win some games and go to the playoffs and go far in the playoffs. That’s what it is for me.”
At this stage of his career, he’s realistic. He knows he’s not going to overtake Wake, whom he called the best in the league at his position, and he’s willing to accept the role of “Swiss Army knife” and adapt to whatever task the staff assigns him.
But his bold beliefs aren’t limited to space and sea.
“I feel like I’m one of the best run-stopping defensive ends in the NFL,” he said. “That’s just point blank. Period.”
And you can add this to the list of things he doesn’t think exist: “I still don’t think there’s a man in the NFL that’s going to knock me off the line of scrimmage. That’s not being arrogant, that’s just what it is.”
One thing that’s clear about Hayes is he’s steadfast. There are certain truths in his mind that simply cannot be changed.
Jimmy Kimmel took him to the Natural History Museum in Los Angeles for a segment with a dinosaur expert, and that only reaffirmed to Hayes that this is all a big hoax perpetrated by archaeologists. Inexplicably, the museum trip strengthened his confidence that mermaids are out there waiting to be discovered.
“I’m just saying there possibly could be,” he said. “There’s a lot of water we haven’t discovered. I just can’t say there are not mermaids.
“We find different life forms every day.”
And perhaps we’ll find them in space. Hayes is betting on it.
“I’m not necessarily saying a human or a legit alien with some things coming out of his head,” he said. “I’m just thinking there could be other life forms.”
Considering the United Arab Emirates are putting together plans to colonize Mars by 2117, Hayes hopes they get there ahead of schedule. He’s intrigued by the chance to explore it for himself and said, “That sounds pretty dope, man.”
He’s here to play defensive line and he’s here to debate. He says he’ll keep talking regardless of whether anyone is actually listening, including coach Adam Gase.
“If Gase just hits me up one time, he could feel where I’m coming from,” he promised.
The best part is he’s got many more eccentric theories he’ll be happy to share throughout the year, and he’s not worried about whether they make sense to anyone in his locker room.
“I wouldn’t expect nobody else to believe in them,” Hayes said. “I don’t really mind what nobody else thinks.”