DAILY BRIDGE CLUB:

“Grapefruit told me he moved into a new retirement home,” Unlucky Louie informed us in the lounge.

“What’s its name?” I asked.

“Based on his behavior, Atrocious Manors,” Cy the Cynic observed.

Grapefruit, our acidtongued member, makes his partners miserable. He was today’s North. His cue bid of three hearts substituted for the Stayman convention. West led the ace and queen of hearts, and South took the king and started the diamonds.

Alas, West discarded on the second diamond, and though the jack of spades fell doubleton, South couldn’t untangle his nine tricks. He went down one, and Grapefruit told the kibitzers that South was one taco short of a combination plate.

Diamonds will break

5-1 about 14 percent of the time. After South takes the king of hearts, he gets an extra chance by cashing the A-Q of spades. When the jack falls, he takes the 10 of spades, four diamonds and then the king of spades to fulfill the contract.

DAILY QUESTION: You hold: ♠ K642 ♥ 93 ◆ A KJ93 ♣ 9 4. With only your side vulnerable, the dealer, at your left, opens three hearts. Your partner doubles, and the next player bids four hearts. What do you say?

ANSWER: You might turn a profit by doubling, but your prospects to make a vulnerable game are bright. Since partner is almost sure to have good support for the other major, bid four spades.