Ships In The Harbor (Easter)

I officiated at my first funeral when I was a student at Perkins School of Theology at Southern Methodist University in Dallas, Texas. The pastor of the Methodist church in Grapevine, Texas, where I was serving as an assistant pastor was on vacation when one of the members died. I was asked to conduct his funeral. Since then, I have been a part of 451 funerals, memorial services, celebrations of life, or committals. In addition, I have attended numerous other services. Even with this background, I found the services for Barbara Carol Van Vactor Miller on Saturday, March 16, 2024, to be somewhat unique.

There were two services for Barb on the 16th: one at First United Methodist church and a second at REES Theatre. A third was to be held on Sunday, March 24, at the IU Kelley School of Business in Bloomington, Indiana. The service at the church was a traditional memorial service. What made it unique was that it was the first service to be held in the sanctuary of Plymouth First United Methodist since was assessed as unstable five years before because of structural problems. One of Barb’s last wishes was that her funeral service be at the church.

The service at the REES was a celebration of the life of Barbara Van Vactor Miller. The first part was a time of general mixing among friends. The second part was a time of sharing by the family. This featured a video tribute for Barb and her husband, David; one for Barb and her son Patrick; one for Barb and her daughter, Sarah. This section closed with her son-in-law, Pablo Fuentes, performing “Ships in the Harbor.” The final section included messages from the audience. Two groups, P.E.O. and Tri Kappa, shared. The celebration concluded with closing remarks by Dave, Patrick and Sarah and a song written especially for Barb, “Sing Together” that featured solos by Patrick, Sarah, and their friends.

“Ships in the Harbor” was new to me. Tommy Prine wrote it near his birthday in 1921 for his father who had died the previous year. The song is a reflection on loss and grief when a loved one or a friend gets on a ship in the harbor and goes out to sea. A theme that occurs over and over in the song is “’Cause they must be leaving soon as they should.” In verse 2 Prine talks about visiting with an old friend as they are getting ready to leave soon. The songs chorus speaks of the grief of the parting: “When I’m standing by water it gets harder and harder. It’s why I get sad when there’s a ship in the harbor. ‘Cause they must be leaving soon, as they should.” As Barbara’s family was sharing at the celebration at the REES, one got the feeling that Barb was a part of the planning for the event as she was going down to the harbor to be leaving soon.

Two of the great Christian song writers of the last half of the 20th century were Bill and Gloria Gaither. In 1971 they wrote “Because He Lives.” The refrain focuses on John 14:19, “Because I (Jesus) live, you will live also.” “Because he lives, I can face tomorrow; because he lives all fear is gone; because I know he holds the future, and life is worth the living just because he lives.”

Easter is a yearly reminder that Jesus lives and, therefore, we have reason to go down to our ship when it is set to sail for a kingdom that God has prepared for us with confidence and hope.