Still taking the ex to see the fam
DEARANNIE>> My boyfriend is still taking his ex-girlfriend to see his son and his son’s family, who reside in another state. He says that she is very active in his grandkids’ life and that they love her very much. He says he has no romantic feelings for her, but they still communicate often.
I have been introduced to his family only once. I have never been invited to their home. He says it would be too confusing for the grandchildren. What should I do? I feel it may be time to end this relationship. Other than this, we get along great.
— Thinking About Letting Go
DEAR THINKING ABOUT LETTING GO >> Trust your intuition. If something does not feel right about the relationship between your boyfriend and his ex-girlfriend, then chances are that something is not right between them. You deserve to be with a partner who wants to bring you around to see his family. There are plenty of men out there who would love and cherish you the way you deserve, but for them to find you, you have to be free of this uncommitted boyfriend. I think you already know that.
DEARANNIE>> I have easily over 100 books on my bookshelf that I haven’t read. But I really do want to read them! How can I discipline myself to read for fun? I know that it all starts with just one book — and then another and another — but I find the full shelves daunting, like a lengthening to-do list. I’ve even donated some unread books, to try to help the piles. Do you have any tips for moving books from “to read” to “read”?
— Bummed-Out Bibliophile
DEARBUMMED-OUTBIBLIOPHILE>> You are not the only person who has dozens of unread books on her shelf. In fact, the Japanese have a word for this phenomenon >> tsundoku.
To unleash your inner bookworm, start with something fun — not something dense and literary but a real page turner that will help you rediscover the joy of getting lost in a book as you did when you were a kid. If a particular book isn’t your cup of tea, put it down and start another; don’t feel you have to force your way through something. Try listening to audiobooks during your commute or while you’re doing chores around the house. This can ease you back into the joy of a good yarn without taking additional time out of your day. And when you are sitting down to read, do so in a room free of electronics. The siren song of phones and tablets can easily lure us away from literary odysseys.
DEARANNIE>> Please remind your readers that deer are wild animals and that they shouldn’t feed them. Feeding them makes them unafraid of people. If they are encouraged to stay in town limits, tragedy is bound to happen. We just lost our dog because of an attack by a deer. Please be careful around these wild animals. They can be very aggressive. — Grieving
DEARGRIEVING>> I’m so sorry for the loss of your beloved pup. They really are members of the family. I have to confess that I’ve always perceived deer to be meek creatures, and I hadn’t heard of deer attacking domestic animals before. After looking into it, I found several stories of deer attacking not just dogs but also humans. It’s better and safer for everyone to leave wildlife wild, no matter how cute or meek it seems.
“Ask Me Anything: A Year of Advice From Dear Annie” is out now! Annie Lane’s debut book — featuring favorite columns on love, friendship, family and etiquette — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.