Fade to Gray: Weight it out
Has it happened yet? Have you stepped on the scale and said, “Jesus, Mary and Joseph, that’s not good.” I’m here to tell you it’s not entirely your fault. I was thinking about it the other day and we Americans are absolutely set up for failure when it comes to watching what we eat.
Let’s say for the sake of argument that you just wrapped up summer and you’re in pretty good shape. Good for you Jack LaLanne. (For those under 35 who have no idea who that is, ask your parents). What comes next? Labor Day and a big end of summer picnic. So, you indulge in way too much beer and cheeseburgers. Odds are you plan to use those first couple of weeks of September getting back to the gym but school just started so there are kids to get on and off busses and parent teacher things happening. No worries, you’ll hit it hard come October 1st.
What happens next to derail your plans? Halloween candy, it’s everywhere in every store you go to. Granted Halloween isn’t for a month but the candy is out and the sales are fantastic and the last thing you want is to get to October 30th and realize you need Snickers bars and Kit Kats. So you buy a few bags at Walmart or CVS with every intention of squirreling them away until the little goblins knock on your door in costume.
One night you’re sitting there innocently on the couch watching Netflix when you worry your blood sugar may be crashing. Solution? You remember you have those bags of candy up in the cupboard so you take out just one to have a snack. Next thing you know the bag is half empty.
Aweek goes by and you have company dropping by for a visit but you forgot to stop at the store and pick up one of those little Entenmann’s cakes. Wait, you think, don’t I have another bag of candy bars? So now that bag is gone. Pretty soon you realize there is only one bag left and that’s not enough for the trick-ortreaters so you might as well eat that last bag and then shop again for more candy with the promise that this time you won’t open them.
Assuming you keep that promise Halloween comes and goes and suddenly everyone at work is bringing leftover candy in and leaving it all over the place. Just one or two Hershey’s kisses can’t hurt right? This snacking goes on for the next two weeks when you realize it is now time to get serious and get in shape. Just one problem. Thanksgiving is like a week away.
So you hold off and keep eating bad until turkey day comes and goes and you’ve eaten more stuffing and potatoes than a small village in New Hampshire. At least now Labor Day picnics, Halloween and Thanksgiving are done and you can buckle down. Except, Christmas is like three weeks away. So you kind of eat healthy but not really knowing that Christmas is the last straw and then you really, really have to get this diet under control.
Christmas is now behind you except it doesn’t make sense to start a diet until after New Year’s Eve and all the fun that brings. Which is where we are today, January 2nd and finally we can stop eating bad stuff. Right? You take a trip to the store to buy some salad and everywhere you look are big red hearts reminding you that Valentine’s Day is coming and that means more chocolate falling from the sky. Once that’s done it’s only a few weeks until Easter and even more candy. You see my point. You’re kind of doomed.
If we are truly to follow this guideline I suppose the only shot you have to eat healthy is between April and the 4th of July. That’s when the summer barbecues kick in and the cycle starts all over again.
I’m just teasing of course. We are all capable of talking ourselves into or out of healthy living. My biggest downfall is my work hours, coming home hungry late at night. As my wife will tell you my greatest success came when I purchased sugar free hot cocoa mix. I’d come home at midnight, zap some water in the microwave and slowly sip the cocoa. It didn’t really fill me but it took the edge off the desire to munch.
I also remind my wife that nature plays a cruel trick on all of us in that as we get older our metabolism does slow down. You think of the stuff you got away with eating at 18 that didn’t touch your waistline and how it affects you now. Life just isn’t fair I guess.
I saw a funny meme the other day. It said in life we go from believing in Santa Claus, to being Santa Claus, to looking like Santa Claus. My goal in 2019 is to get back to the hot cocoa at night and treadmill in the day. I’ve done it before so I know I can do it again and if that’s your goal too then I wish you much success. Happy New Year and here’s to a healthier you.
John Gray is a news anchor on WXXA-Fox TV 23 and ABC’S WTEN News Channel 10. His column is published every Wednesday. Email him at johngray@fox23news.com.