The Register Citizen (Torrington, CT)

A friend flaunts her wealth

- Annie Lane

Dear Annie: A friend and I have known each other for a decade. Whereas she has been married to the same man for over 30 years, I was usually a single mother. Our daughters are about the same age, and we have the same jobs. We also were raised in abusive homes.

I have been poor all my life and have priorities besides money and bank accounts. She has a husband who makes engineerin­g wages, and they go on vacation every year. When she returns, she plasters the atmosphere in front of my face with photos of her latest excursion, and I cannot relate and could not care less. I don’t flash photos of burgers in front of a homeless person to show what I had for lunch, which is what I liken her actions to. She has also begun rattling on incessantl­y about her savings bonds and commenting on how old my car is, which we have to take whenever we go out to save hers. Am I merely jealous, or is there something to how I feel? Less Than

Dear Less Than: A friend doesn’t boast about how great her financial situation is while mocking the condition of your car. At the same time, a friend usually wants to see fun photos of a nice family vacation. Sharing those photos and waving a hamburger in front of a homeless person are two very different things. Considerin­g that you couldn’t care less about her photos and she is making rude comments about your car, this does not sound like a friendship at all. But the fact that you are writing to me leads me to believe that you really like her. Instead of bottling everything in, why not tell your friend how you feel?

Dear Annie: I was heartbroke­n to read the letter to you from “Still Suffering,” the woman who, because of financial hardships and health problems, moved back in with her parents, who abused her when she was a child.

I am disappoint­ed that you did not direct her to contact women’s resource services. Many areas have services for women in abusive relationsh­ips. Though she is not in an abusive romantic relationsh­ip, the situation isn’t very different. Please let her know there are people who are sending her love.

Supportive in Sarasota

Dear Supportive: Thank you for your wise suggestion. Advocates at The National Domestic Violence Hotline can help refer abuse survivors to resources in their area. I encourage anyone in such a position to call. The number is 800-799-7233.

Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.

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