Senior year in quarantine a hassle

As I’m writing this, I know I should be walking through the halls of West Haven High School, wearing a sash with my name on it in celebration of my final choir concert, racking my brain for the words and harmonies to all the songs I’ll be singing tonight. I should be preparing for my prom that takes place in just a couple of weeks, thinking of what color my tie is going to be, and where I’ll meet up with friends to take pictures. I should be preparing for the show I’m directing that premieres tomorrow night, and hoping that everyone does well at rehearsal today after school. But instead, I’m writing this at my desk, a desk that I’ve sat at every day, from 9 in the morning to 1 in the afternoon, for the past eight weeks.

Before this, I would go out with friends as often as I could. Now, I can count how many times I’ve left the house in those eight weeks on one hand. Before this, I loved going to school, seeing my best friends and favorite teachers five days a week. Now, I can only see them through a computer screen. Before this, I was so excited for college — the next chapter of my life. Now, I just hope and pray that I can actually go in the fall.

Life in this forced quarantine isn’t easier, especially for an extrovert like me. I can only walk around the block so many times. I’ve tried to make a routine, like so many people recommend, but for me, it doesn’t make it any better, only more boring. The lack of something to do, the yearning to be with friends, the knowledge that you’ve lost so much of what was supposed to be an amazing school year — it starts to add up very quickly. It doesn’t help that the news constantly shows how many people are being affected by this virus, from those infected and fighting for their lives, to those losing their jobs, their businesses and their livelihoods. It especially hurts to think about those stuck at home with abusive spouses or parents, without ready access to the internet, or with a family member whose life is on the line.

So what gets me through this? Not much, honestly, but there is something. It’s the thought that things will get better, eventually. As cliche as that might sound, it does help to think that every day that passes is one day closer to the end. Not only that, I’ve found a variety of things that have helped make me feel better: Zoom calls with friends, cleaning my room, cooking and reading, just to name a few. I try to change things up as much as possible to keep things interesting and stray away from the monotony that often plagues quarantine life.

That is what I'm going through as a senior right now. It is one experience out of many in these hectic times, an experience that I’ve been struggling to put into words for weeks, influenced by a flurry of emotions that I know aren’t unique to just myself. I am hopeful that we will soon be out of this, but until then, I’d better just start my next assignment.