Losses, large and small, not nearly over

My coaching philosophy in my inaugural season of youth basketball last year was pretty simple. Everyone plays. Don’t give up any easy layups. If someone on the other team wants to shoot 25-footers all game, go ahead and let him, but get in position for that rebound.

More important than any wisdom I might have imparted, the experience I shared with my kids and their peers was irreplaceable. No one on that court is likely to make a living playing basketball, but the kids on my teams had fun, got a little better as the season went along and had an experience they could maybe tuck into their memory banks in what I hope is someday a fond look back on their childhood years.

It was also eye-opening to see the difference between the age groups. For the 7- to 8-year-olds, it was a victory just to get the ball up the court and occasionally near the hoop. The 9- to 11-year-olds, though, are on a whole different level. And if you’re lucky enough to have one of those kids who gets tall early and grabs every rebound in sight (our team was not), you can chalk up a few wins right there.

As the new school year approaches, there are still many more questions than answers about what it all is going to look like. The plans that call for fulltime, in-person learning shouldn’t be mistaken for anything resembling normality. One teacher who has been involved in planning in a Connecticut district described a situation with children sitting in a front-facing desk, with no group work, no story time on the mat and no station activities. Aside from recess and maybe gym, it could be just sitting at a desk for many hours a day, mostly in a mask, for kids as young as 5 or 6.

Connecticut is by some measures the best-positioned state in America to open schools, assuming transmission rates remain low. But there is still so much we don’t know.

As of now, plans are moving ahead in our town for limited fall sports. It remains to be seen how long that will last, and the first sign of an outbreak will doom the whole endeavor, assuming the school system has more sense than Major League Baseball. But fall sports are mostly outside. What about the winter? Is there any chance of getting a park and rec basketball season in this year?

My guess would be no. I don’t see how you can play the game in masks, and any scenario that has a group of people crammed into a confined space is by nature a risk. December is a long way off, but it’s not looking great.

For me, much as I enjoyed last season, it would not be an insurmountable loss. My chances of becoming the next Jim Calhoun were pretty slim anyway.

But the kids only get to do this once. There are no do-overs for childhood, and while their safety comes first, every experience they don’t have is gone forever. Interests change quickly in elementary school.

It’s just one more reminder of everything that has been lost to the coronavirus. Of course there are the deaths, which are tragic and did not have to happen at anything like the magnitude we’ve seen — other countries are measuring deaths in the hundreds, while we recently passed 150,000. There are people who have contracted the disease and not been able to fully recover. Many people have not seen loved ones in months because the risks are too high. But everyone is giving up something. We’ve all seen the maps where Connecticut is one of the only states deemed to have the virus under control. Still, it’s a big country, and travelers arrive every day from parts unknown that have done almost nothing to control the spread. Quarantines and fines only go so far in a country with open borders, and it appears to be mostly luck that is keeping our state’s numbers from a resurgence.

It’s hard to think about cold weather when it’s 90 degrees every day, but we are looking ahead to a long, harsh winter. A lost sports season won’t be the worst of it. But we also need to remember that every loss is important.