Readers advocate respect for opposing viewpoints
DEAR ABBY >> I’m writing regarding “Open-Minded in the South” (Nov. 24), the Christian woman who’s a supporter of the LGBTQ community. She’s concerned about her boyfriend’s mother’s inability to see her viewpoint and the effect it would have on future kids. I experienced something nearly identical. My boyfriend’s grandfather is an ordained pastor, and they raised their kids in a conservative home. After a few conversations with them about LGBTQ people and other issues, we received a six-page letter detailing the “sins” we were committing.
Fast-forward 20 years: I get along with my in-laws fabulously. In fact, the grandfather has said I’m his favorite! We don’t agree on pretty much anything politically, but I do still voice my opinion if the family says something I don’t agree with.
My husband and I have two kids who often hear the in-laws say some judgmental things, and it’s a great segue to a conversation with my kids afterward. They understand that not everyone is going to have the same beliefs, and even though we don’t agree with the in-laws on these issues, we love them dearly. It definitely isn’t a reason to end a good relationship.
As to “Open-Minded’s” boyfriend not being up for the argument with his mom, he could be like my husband who HAS had conversations with them to no avail and realizes it’s futile. DEAR BEEN THERE >> My readers used “Open-Minded’s” letter as an opportunity to have a forum about respect, love and civility. I found their comments both valid and refreshing. Read on:
DEAR ABBY >> It is interesting that open-minded people are often open-minded only if you agree with them and are otherwise completely dogmatic. Neither party will ever convince the other that they are wrong. The solution: Don’t talk about the problem issue.
We have a relative who holds office in a political party opposite to ours. We have a tacit agreement to simply never talk politics, and we get along great. Life is short, and there’s nothing more important than family and friends. Agree to disagree! DEAR ABBY >> When people have an opposing point of view, it doesn’t mean they hate you or are ignorant. Our culture is increasingly unable to engage in reasoned dialogue. Instead, people resort to shouting down reasonable thought and civil debate. My wife and I disagree over substantive issues, but we cope. Our society needs to work toward a renewal of civility.