On turning the BIG 5-0

I turn 50 today. I’ll be honest with you, I don’t feel a day over 44½ and I have no clue where the years went. When I look at the big moments in my life and attach numbers of years to them, well, none of it seems possible.

Nearly 20 years ago, my first child was born; it’s been 27 years since I got my first job after college as a journalist; and 31 years since I graduated from LaSalle in Troy. It feels like the day before yesterday when I was serving as an altar boy at the 7 a.m. Mass at St. Joseph’s church in South Troy, then walking two blocks to my Nana’s house to eat buttered toast and burnt bacon. She wasn’t a bad cook; I asked her to make it that way. That’s how you know you’re loved, when someone will stink up the house just to make you happy.

When you’re young, older people tell you to enjoy your youth because it all goes by in a blink, but you don’t listen. Instead, you toss the years away like old bubble gum wrappers, then one day you wake up and your hair is gray, bones ache and you wonder who the guy in the mirror is with all those wrinkles.

I’m lucky. Even though my life hasn’t turned out exactly as I planned, I have my health, a good job, three great kids and lots of people who love me. Notice I didn’t mention “stuff.” That’s probably the biggest change in me these past five decades; I’ve learned that things are just things. People matter. In the end, it’s all that matters.

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a nice filet mignon as much as the next guy, but the truth is, when you’re starving, a can of Dinty Moore stew tastes just as good.

The first 50 years haven’t been a picnic, and I’m fine with that. It may sound silly, but I’m glad for the hard times. Every time I lost someone it made me love those I still had with me all the more. The times when I didn’t have two nickels to rub together have turned me into a guy who is happy to have five bucks in his pocket.

I’m also lucky for the people I’ve met along the way who believed in me. Dave Kissick, the first teacher to encourage my writing. David Allen, the first radio personality who taught me that it’s OK to just be yourself in front of a camera. And, of course, Doug de Lisle and Lisa Lewis of The Record newspaper for taking me out to lunch 20 years ago and asking me if I wanted to write a weekly newspaper column. I told them there’s no way I could come up with 52 good ideas a year and they both smiled and said, “Sure you can John. Just try.”

I’ve written almost a thousand columns now. That’s about 80,000 words. I guess Doug and Lisa were smarter than me.

They say with age comes wisdom, so, since today is a milestone, I’ll tell you a few things I know at 50 that I didn’t know when I was 20. If you love someone, tell them, and always hug them goodbye. If you don’t want to do something, then don’t; your friends will get over it. Slow down; whatever it is can wait until you get there.

Play with the dog more, it’s good for your mood. If you drop a slice of pizza, it will always fall cheese side down. There’s no such thing as a temporary tax. There’s no diet that works better than eating healthy and exercise. Speaking of which, don’t buy doublestuff Oreos for the kids, you’ll just end up eating them yourself.

And last, but certainly not least, let things go. Being right isn’t always enough; sometimes it’s better to walk away than keep arguing. Trust me, you’ll sleep better.

My goal in life is and has always been to live to be 80. If that’s the case, then I have 30 years to laugh, cry, work, retire and, no doubt, make mistakes. It also means I have thousands more columns to bang out.

Thank you for reading them. You’ll never know what it means to me. This old guy will see you in 2013.