He’s the one
Recently I saw a national newspaper applauding a modern news format that NBC is pushing that targets young people in their teens and twenties. The entire newscast was only four minutes long and spent only 40 seconds on each news story. Understand I’m not talking about, “A tornado hit a town in Kansas and destroyed some homes.” These were complex stories like the President’s son-in-law testifying on possible ties to Russia and collusion. The very young news anchor summed up this very complex story in less time than it takes you to heat up scrambled eggs in the microwave. The newspaper said this kind of news is perfect for young people because they live in such a fast paced world and refuse to pay attention to anything that takes longer than a minute to absorb. Good luck reading Macbeth then or The Stand by Stephen King (1152 pages in the unabridged version, I checked.)
I worry for this generation of kids because what they are being fed is snapshots and Buzzfeed surveys and a gluttony of goofy crap that is little more than advertising disguised as news. I know, I know, I sound like the dinosaur news guy who doesn’t like change. Not true. I have one of the most popular Facebook pages in the entire country and the nearly 80,000 who follow me will tell you I’m not a stick in the mud. It’s just some of the stuff they pass around a gospel is mind numbing.
Just the other day a young person on my page was sharing an article titled- “If he does these 11 things, he’s the one.” Below the link many of her female friends were commenting about how accurate this list was and they boasted how they were sharing it with their friends too. Curious I clicked on it and quickly rolled my eyes. This article told young women who are looking for Mr. Right that “he’s the one” if he does things like, compliments you all the time or asks you how your day was? It also says a guy is a keeper if he busts his butt for you , buys flowers and makes you feel safe. While all are nice qualities for a man to have, most of the 11 items were things that heaped adoration on the woman and said nothing about how he treated the rest of the world.
So for the young women out there who are looking for a great guy let me offer my advice. Look at how he treats his mother and sisters. Those are the most important women in his life and if he is good to them he’ll be good to you. Will he say he’s sorry even if he thinks he’s not wrong, simply because he loves you and doesn’t want to fight anymore or see you upset? If you have a baby or puppy and they keep howling in the night will he split the shifts with you so you get some rest? No matter how tired he is will he set the coffee for the morning if he sees you forgot, especially when he knows you’ll be the first one awake?
Want more? OK, if you are out to eat and can’t decide between two dishes will he order one that you want and let you get the other and tell you if you aren’t happy with your choice you can switch, even though you know he wanted something else on the menu? Is he kind to your family? Does he help people who have no means to pay him back and not tell others about his act of kindness to curry favor? Does he admit when he’s wrong and not rub it in when you are? Will he watch “Say Yes To The Dress” with you when the football game is on?
Does he share your faith? If he doesn’t believe what you believe does he at least respect it and keep an open mind? Does he want kids if you want kids? Is he done playing the field and truly ready to settle down? Is he someone who orders dessert and always wants what the other person has on their plate? If so, run.
Lastly, forget buying you flowers, anyone can do that. Does he help you weed the flowers in the garden when you are down on your hands and knees pulling them out by the roots? And when you walk into a crowded room and have to make your way through does he instinctively reach for your hand and do you give it freely without even thinking?
These to me are the signs you are looking for my friend. Oh and this cuts both ways and all of these attributes I just listed work if you are a guy looking for the right gal. That’s what I think anyway. Sorry I took longer than 40 seconds to explain it. Some things are worth a whole two minutes. John Gray is a news anchor on WXXA-Fox TV 23 and ABC’S WTEN News Channel 10. His column is published every Wednesday. Email him at johngray@fox23news.com.