Happiness and success: The best present

Dear Readers, Well, it is that time of year again when I search my files and offer you something uplifting and inspirational. This year, I have chosen a book by John Powell, S. J. entitled, “Happiness is an Inside Job.” In it, Powell offers us ten practices that he believes will lead to long-term happiness and success. May this holiday season and this coming year bring you happiness, peace, and true fulfillment!

1.We must accept ourselves as we are.

The key verb here is “are”. We must detach ourselves from who we “were” in the past, and who we “might be” in the future. We must embrace the notion that we are all “works in progress,” always learning, changing and growing.

2. We must accept full responsibility for our lives.

We live in a blame-filled society! No one seems to want to accept responsibility for anything these days. The truth is that blamers are out of touch with reality, and as such, they cannot mature and grow. Growth begins when blaming ends. It is only by fully embracing responsibility that we ensure that we will realize our full potential as human beings.

3. We must fulfill our needs for relaxation, exercise, and nourishment.

We are all a combination of mind, body and spirit. These three aspects of ourselves are intimately interconnected, so an imbalance in one area will adversely affect the others. Attending to our physical needs will allow us to maximally utilize our mental and spiritual resources, which is necessary to live a happy and successful life.

5. We must make our lives an act of love.

Love is the most powerful force in the universe. It is God in action in our lives. Without love, true and lasting success is impossible.

6. We must stretch by stepping out of our comfort zone.

We will only grow as human beings if we take the risk of getting rejected and hurt. There is no true growth without vulnerability. We must learn to survive and grow from our setbacks, otherwise, we are doomed to a life of stagnation without true fulfillment.

7. We must learn to be “good finders.”

We will ultimately find what we are seeking. True happiness and success depends on looking for and finding what is good and right in everyone and everything.

8. We must seek growth, not perfection.

The human condition is one of trial and error. There is a difference between being your best, and being perfect. Imperfection is part of the human experience, but so is growth. Our focus should be on forever growing in all aspects of our lives, knowing that perfection and the pursuit of it is fruitless.

9. We must learn to communicate effectively.

All relationships thrive on communication. Most of our human problems can be traced back to a failure of communication. Truly listening to another and having them feel understood is the greatest gift we can give or receive.

10. We must learn to enjoy the good things of life.

There is a line in the Talmud that reads, “Everyone will be called to account for all the legitimate pleasures which he or she had failed to enjoy.” God wants us to enjoy all the good things he had given us. Sometimes we get so caught up with achieving our goals, that we miss a lot of beauty along the way. We all can benefit from better learning to cultivate the art of enjoying.

11. We must make prayer part of our daily lives.

As stated earlier, all relationships thrive on good communication. Our relationship with God is no exception. Communication with God has a special name; prayer. Without prayer, there can be no true relationship with God. Without this relationship, all other relationships lose their meaning. Strive to communicate and have a good relationship with God, and your relationship with others can’t help but get better.

Dr. Raymond Angelini of New Horizons Coaching has been in private practice for 30 years in Saratoga Springs. He specializes in assisting individuals in finding and sustaining careers that are more rewarding, lifeenhancing and in keeping with one’s personal and spiritual values. For more information, email rayangel1@live.com or visit his website at www. newhorizonscoaching.com.