Conspiracy theories, ‘foreign’ entries stir intrigue for tub races
It may only be a coincidence, but one has to wonder as a team of foreigners (well, Texans anyway) have signed up to enter the annual bathtub races just as allegations of subterfuge have been raised in the volatile Battle of the Badge competition.
“It doesn’t quite rise to the level of Russian hacking of the American election, but intrigue has entered the picture for the 12th Annual Stueart Pennington Running Of The Tubs bathtub races scheduled for Saturday in downtown Hot Springs,” a news release from Visit Hot Springs, which sponsors the races, said.
“It seems the coveted Battle of the Badge plaque is missing.”
The Battle of the Badge is one of the fiercely competitive aspects of The Running Of The Tubs, pitting teams from the Hot Springs Fire Department and the Hot Springs Police Department in head-to-head combat for possession of the coveted plaque.
The last time the plaque was seen in public was in the possession of the fire department team after its victory at the 2016 Running Of The Tubs. Now it is missing, and suspicious glances are being cast at the police department, which “ain’t saying nothing” about the issue, the release said.
“The Hot Springs Fire Department cannot locate the prestigious award and sketchy sources say the plaque may be in police custody,” said Bill Solleder, special events manager for Visit Hot Springs.
At a pre-race session to explain the race’s rules, there was a certain amount of trash-talk. Police Officer 1st Class Joey Williams said, “We let them win last year to build their confidence, this year it’s over, we will show them who’s boss.”
Fire department representative Kevin Vaughn responded, “If you want to have the cops win, put a doughnut at the end of the race.”
The issue apparently will be resolved at the conclusion of this year’s Battle of the Badge, Solleder said.
Needless to say, with con-
spiracy plots running rampant, a few eyebrows have been raised by the news that a team from Austin, Texas, has entered the race with the rather suspicious moniker of The Stranger Things/Austin Weirdos.
“This is our first out-ofstate entry and it could signal the beginning of something big for our race,” said Steve Arrison, CEO of Visit Hot Springs.
“Out of the blue, we received an entry form and entry fee from Brett Beeler of Austin,” Solleder said. “It came as a total surprise to us, but a surprise that we welcome.”
Beeler said his team would “probably not have the most professional-looking or fastest tub in the race, but our costumes and enthusiasm will make up for it.”
“Stranger Things” is a hit television show on Netflix that also has contributed one of its stars, Shannon Purser, to the Spa-Con comics-science fiction convention to be held in Hot Springs in September.
“I read about the bathtub races about a year ago on a list of the best small-town events around the country and thought it would be great to see and even greater to participate in,” Beeler said.
He put together a team of friends from Austin “plus one Californian who is flying in to join us” and submitted his entry.
The Austin team joins these other entries in The Running Of The Tubs: Maxwell Blade Tribute Tub; Quapaw Baths; Hot Springs Police Department; Hot Springs Fire Department; Visit Hot Springs; Riser Ford; The Arlington Resort Hotel & Spa; Habitat for Humanity; The Waters Hotel; LakePointe, and CHI Nurses — Critical Care Chicks.
The festivities begin at 5 p.m. Friday with the Paddock Party at the Exchange Street Parking Plaza, 128 Exchange St., followed by the Judging of the Tubs at 6 p.m., with music from 7 p.m. until 10 p.m. Lots of awards will be given out for unusual tubs, costumes and so forth.
Exchange Street, north of the Parking Plaza entrance, will be closed to through traffic from 2-10 p.m. Friday for the various activities.
On Saturday, the Parade of Tubs begins at 9 a.m. with the Running of the Tubs to follow at 9:30 a.m.
Central Avenue, from Fountain to Reserve streets, will be closed to through traffic from
8:45-11 a.m. for the races. The race is named in honor of the late Stueart Pennington, a downtown businessman who championed the idea of a bathtub race to celebrate the city’s bathing history.
The race is held each year on Central Avenue, beginning at the north end of Bathhouse Row and finishing near its southern end.
“We are looking forward to another morning filled with more high jinks than the old ‘Laugh In’ TV show,” Arrison said.
Arrison said the intricate rules, which already incorporate arcane standards governing hats, suspenders, loofah mitts, bath towels and water levels, are subject to sudden and unannounced changes, “sometimes even after the race starts.”
“Tubs entered in SPROTT must be real bathtubs, at least
48 inches long and 24 inches wide. They can be ‘standard’ or ‘modified,’” he said.
The “death penalty” rule will remain in effect for this year’s races, which specifies that any team member who argues with one of the judges “will be barred from bathing on Central Avenue forever,” Arrison said.
Among the many arbitrary and complicated rules that will be implemented “ruthlessly” by The Running Of The Tubs Committee are these:
• The Running Of The Tubs will consist of five-member teams pushing bathtubs — on wheels of course — the length of Bathhouse Row.
• Any bathtub may be entered, provided it is no smaller than 4 feet long and 2 feet wide.
• The wheels on the tub must be no bigger than 30 inches in diameter and mounted on axles no more than 44 inches wide. No coasters or casters will be allowed.
• No motors or mechanical devices can be used to push the tub. Four members of the team must power the tub, which will contain the fifth member, plus water.
• Of the four members pushing the tub, one must carry a large bar of soap, one must carry a nice bath mat, one must wear a loofah mitt and one must carry a bath towel.
• The fifth member of the team must be in the bathtub, taking a bath from the start of the race to the official finish line. Each team member must keep one hand on the tub at all times.
• Each team crossing the finish line must still have in their possession the bar of soap, the bathmat, the loofah mitt, and the bath towel or they will be disqualified.
• The bathtub must be full of water at the start of the race and have at least 10 gallons of water left in the tub at the finish line. If the judges find less than 10 gallons of water left in the tub the team will be disqualified.
Arrison said the race will start in the middle of Central Avenue at the north end of Bathhouse Row and finish in the middle of Central Avenue at the southern end of Bathhouse Row.
“We have all sorts of arbitrary rules for this event,” Arrison said. “I have probably left some out, but here are a few more:”
• All team members must be 18 or older.
• The four team members pushing the tubs must wear hats of some type and shape and also some suspenders.
• Anything goes, including water balloons, costumes and race strategies.
The winning team will receive a traveling winner’s trophy that it will keep until the next year’s race. Individual team members will receive a trophy. Two additional trophies will be given, one for the Most Original Tub and one for the Most Humorous Tub.
Call Solleder at 501-321-2027 for more information.