The Standard Journal

Taking offense to those focused on trivial offenses

- CHRIS COLLETT Chris Collett is a lifelong resident of Canton.

With the world facing a crisis at every turn, we have some who have decided to be offended at the song, “Baby It’s Cold Outside.” To appease the ones who are offended, some radio stations have even stopped playing the song.

The offended believe that the song somehow speaks of a man pushing a woman into something she doesn’t want to do, in the physical sense. Others claim the song talks about the man spiking the woman’s drink to take advantage of her. For the record, any man who touches any woman in an unwanted manner ceases to be a man. I stand by that statement.

This song was written in 1944. It was a time when men were men and women were women. Better yet, they knew the difference between the sexes. There was no bathroom controvers­y in relation to which one to use. Most young men knew how to treat a lady. Failure to do so would end in a “whoopin’” if their mama and daddy found out. For those of you who have never experience­d a hickory to the back side, it gets your attention. Usually, after one of these talks behind the woodshed, the same mistakes weren’t made twice. This song is nothing more than a song and dance between a man and a woman from a more moral time in history.

There is another controvers­y surroundin­g the song and television program “Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer.” The comments mainly surround the fact that Rudolph was bullied by his buddies. Somehow, this might encourage bullying in the lives of our young. I have news for you. Bullies don’t need encouragem­ent to bully others from a cartoon about fictional reindeer. Bullies are cowards who obviously have never seen the back of a woodshed. That should give you some idea how I feel about bullies. But, to think this song and show promote bullying is idiotic.

While we are on the topic of offensive Christmas songs, let’s address a couple more that might be offensive to this special little group we call the offended.

One that comes to mind is “Frosty the Snowman.” First off, why does Frosty have to be a man? Couldn’t this be offensive to women? One can only imagine that the writer of this fable was sexist in nature. Another thing that should be addressed is the fact that Frosty goes around with a pipe in his mouth. We are never told if this is a crack pipe or just a regular old tobacco pipe. Either way. He’s a smoker. Surely, we don’t want to send kids the message that smoking is cool. I imagine the anti-smokers have a fit when this program airs. Furthermor­e, walking around smoking a pipe can get you a citation in some jurisdicti­ons. Frosty had better be careful.

The country band Alabama sings a Christmas tune called “Christmas in Dixie.” I don’t even know where to begin with this one. In our racist culture, it’s hard to believe you can still hear this song from time to time on the radio. The word Dixie has become offensive although it wasn’t for many years. In a recent trip to the mountains with the family, I noticed that Dolly Parton’s showplace Dixie Stampede has even changed its name to Dolly Parton’s Stampede. I’ve always thought racism is a matter of the mind and heart. That just goes to show you how little I know. As a fan of Elvis’ song “American Trilogy,” I’m sure some would refer to me as a redneck. A redneck I may be. A racist I’m not. Besides, it’s hard to eat at the Waffle House and not listen to a little Elvis.

I’ll end this song bashing by mentioning “Grandma Got Run Over by A Reindeer.” If she hadn’t drank so much of the eggnog, maybe things would have turned out differentl­y. I can’t help but think of the poor kids and grandkids witnessing their drunken granny. My grannies didn’t drink. If yours did or do, exercise your right to be offended by this song as it causes you bad memories.

If my words have offended you, I can only say I’m sorry. I’m sorry your sensitive nature keeps you up at night worrying about meaningles­s issues. There are many facing real tribulatio­ns. For those special ones offended by any of these songs, have you ever listened to rap music? Or, David Allen Coe?

In conclusion, baby it’s cold outside!

 ??  ?? Collett
Collett

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