The Boy Who Never Was comes to Iverness Castle
Part II: The Loch Ness Monster
The Boy Who Never Was sidled down to the River Ness, patting his dog Gatsby on the head as he went. He was following the Big Foot giant and marveling at the stillness of the water. His heart was beating strongly in anticipation of what he was going to see. He had always suspected that the Loch Ness Monster was some kind of a throwback to the dinosaurs that had populated the world in the Jurassic age. He surmised that the monster had probably found a way to survive the meteoric cataclysm that had hit Mexico and destroyed the rest of his companions millions of years ago.
The creature had probably taken refuge in the deep loch when it had retreated from the boiling waters that had created the Gulf of Mexico. Now the Boy Who Never Was wondered just how the monster had sustained itself for so many centuries thereafter. The first accounts of the creature in the sixth century had reported that it was a “river beast” that was getting ready to attack “Pict” settlers there, as the early Scots were known. Their chronicles reported that an Irish holy man named Saint Columba (565 A.D.) had learned of the serpentine creature that was known to attack swimmers at the Ness River. The saint sent one of his disciples named Luigne mocci Min to bait the beast. St. Columba had made the sign of the cross and said: “Go no further. Do not touch the man. Go back at once.” Thus began the exodus of the snakes that St. Patrick completed later in the twelfth century.
The Boy Who Never Was was more curious than worried about suddenly coming upon the dragonesque beast, especially since the Big Foot and his dog were with him also. The Yeti had mentioned to the youth that Celtic legends referred to the serpentine creature as “Canránach” and as “Olliphéist.” Like other water creatures, the monster was not as terrifying as the youth had dreaded. It was an herbivore, like many descendants of dinosaurs — such as the brontosaurus, triceratops, the Dracorex and the Argentinosaurus.
The youth who never was thought that the “monster” would be something more akin to the Yeti, but not as gentle. Instead “Nessie,” as the youth called it, was silky and smooth, like a dolphin.
“Several historians have tried to equate me with the monster ‘Grendel’ out of Anglo-Saxon legend,” Nessie said. “Unlike me, he was a carnivore. Conquering people write histories and legends and thus, creatures dissimilar to them are depicted as evil beings. Grendel was merely defending his territory from invaders. Me, I chose to retreat and hide myself in the dark waters of the loch, despite what a long-forgotten monk wrote down 14 centuries ago.”
“My parents were Plesiosaurs who guided me away from danger because they wanted me to survive,” the creature continued. “They taught me how to feed on plants and to be kind to smaller creatures than me. Usually, I stay in hiding while the sun is shining and only come out after dark. One night, though, the moon came out from behind some dark clouds, when a photographer happened to be taking pictures by the light of the moon. He happened to capture my shape in the night. Since then, those who do not know any better call me ‘the Loch Ness Monster.’ I would hate to call people ‘monsters’ just because I didn’t get to know them well.”
From the shore of Loch Ness, the Yeti nodded his head in agreement. The Boy Who Never Was had learned a couple of lessons that he had never expected; first from the Yeti, then from the Three Witch Sisters and now from a wayward dinosaur, who was probably the last of his kind. The Big-Foot giant melded into the background in a moment of silence. The youth was learning lessons about life that would help him go further. Suddenly, the Yeti came closer and patted Nessie on his slick back. It was time to take the youth to another spot.