Pondering the scariest times in life

From an early age, people have to deal with a lot of scary things in life. The first was probably popping out of that dark chamber … into the hands of a doctor, wearing a mask, who is hurrying to make his tee time at the country club.

Over the next few years there was the first visit to Santa Claus, the boogie man under the bed and the monster in the basement.

In later years it was, for boys, the first curve ball that started at your head and broke over the plate. For girls, it was that first kiss.

You might think the scary experiences in life would end … as the years flew by and maturity started to take over. Not true.

Talk to most parents and they will admit that two of the scariest things in life come in rather rapid succession.

The first is those months immediately after a child – yes a child of 16 – gets a driver’s license. If there is anyone who does not think there will be more than a few dangerous moments … then they really don’t know anything about a child of 16.

The second comes during the process of sending a child to college. That is especially true today, when shipping a child off to college is like sending them to a cult … on another planet … in another universe.

A recent visit to the Outer Banks in North Carolina saw an active day unwind into a leisurely dinner at a local favorite, JK’s Steak & Seafood. The private room, decorated with action rodeo photos, provided the perfect atmosphere. Scary scenes … scary dinner topics.

Back to the perils of raising children. All three of the fathers – who had no idea they would be my subjects for an evening of analysis – had two children. The first had two in high school, one of which was just learning to drive. The second had two in college. The third had two millennials, now trying to make their way in the work world.

The first sent his children to a Christian high school. Despite the structure provided by a religious background, there was still plenty of apprehension. Much of it centered on the upcoming decision regarding college.

The father had attended a small, private college in the midlands of North Carolina. It came with a modest $12,000 a year tuition – in his day. Now the tuition is $58,000. A new, cosmopolitan atmosphere had overtaken the school – under a new, very progressive president. He claims his main objective is to prepare the students for the real world. Some of his most noted initiatives are establishing a concierge service that makes dinner reservations for students at area restaurants. Employees circulate the campus and pass out free ice cream to students on hot days … and distribute umbrellas on rainy days.

And that is supposed to pre-