Having ‘The Talk’ about college costs with your teen

A four-year journey to decide where to go to college ended for Sofie Adams when a college recruiter approached her after a softball game and asked, “Do you want to study abroad?”

“No one else had asked me that, and yes — I really do want to get overseas,” says Adams, 18, who considered several schools before taking an academic scholarship and an offer to play this fall for St. Lawrence University, a 2,500-student private college in upstate New York with a study abroad program.

Her father, Urban Adams, a financial planner based in Irvine, California, was delighted, too. He also was relieved: The scholarship will pay the majority of his daughter’s tuition, and Sofie is the first of his three children, all of whom plan to enter college in the next four years.

Begin at the start of high school

Whether you have three teenagers or just one young one, planning is essential when it comes to the cost of education. Sometime after telling your kids about “the birds and the bees,” but before you hand over the family car keys, financial advisers recommend having the talk with your teen about who is paying for college.

The opportunity to study abroad was the last box Sofie checked as she narrowed her choices: a small liberal arts school with a strong softball team and business degree program, as well as four seasons of weather (unlike Arizona and Southern California, where she grew up).

That list didn’t exist when she first discussed college options with her parents when she was 13. “At that time, I barely knew what I wanted for lunch, let alone college,” she recalls.

But she learned her parents wouldn’t be footing the full bill, and realized her grades and her love of softball could hold the keys to attending the college of her choice.

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Your top savings priority should be for your own retirement. Save at least 10 percent of your income in an employer-sponsored plan such as a 401(k) or a tax-advantaged individual retirement account, advisers recommend.