An anxiety reliever for estate documents — you can change your mind

Some years ago I had a client who announced it is impossible to plan because “things keep changing.” Without missing a step I answered “because things keep changing we have to plan.” The answer was instinctual. That does not always mean everything has to be taken down on paper but many times it should be. It should be a stress reliever, though, to know you can change your mind and change your documents as things change. Otherwise you can be paralyzed by indecision.

First, there are life cycle changes. When children are young, you could wrestle with who should serve as guardian or trustee if you or you and your spouse die or are seriously injured. Your brother and his wife live at a distance. You think your in-laws might not raise your children your way. It is understandable you would be conflicted. You could need to make a decision anyway but know you can change your mind. The alternative is that a court might wind up making the decision for you in the case of tragedy and it might not be the decision you want.

In mid-life you now have the income and the assets. The children might have jobs or be attending college. Will they be responsible? When are they ready? Should they inherit outright or should there be a trust that pays out over time and who should be the trustee? Sometimes appointing another family member to be in charge can get awkward. Would you consider an institutional trustee or a bank trust department?

Your child may be disabled or become disabled. You may need either a support or a special needs trust.