We are Gen X, and hear us ... well, we’re not going to roar
If life were a comic book … one panel would feature aging Boomers, desperately trying to hold on to a way of life that has passed them by … another panel would feature Millennials, screaming at the top of their lungs for anything and everything that either deserves or doesn’t deserve screaming about … another panel would show Gen Z, eyes cast downward to their devices, disconnected from humanity.
And then … up in the sky … a simple symbol would appear. A giant “X.” And with it, a call to (not-quite) arms. A forgotten generation would rise from the ashes (of the remnants of the bowl they were smoking behind their shed after their kids went to sleep). They would take to the streets en masse, nod at one another, and leap (well, slowly move) into action (kind of).
Can’t you just see it now? The vast majority of those of us born between 1964 and 1980, standing together, and saying, with the might of millions, “You know what? Who cares. Let’s just get along and whatnot. OK?”
And just like that, the country is saved and everyone is happy enough and la-dee-freaking-da.
Seriously: Gen X - my generation, the forgotten generation, the generation that was and remains home to the OG slacker is the only generation worth its salt these days. And not pink Himalayan painstakingly-sourcedby-monks salt; just regular damn salt. Not even Diamond or whatever; store brand.
There’s a great meme floating around, it shows a screaming woman titled “BOOMER,” a second screaming woman titled “MILLENNIAL,” and the third picture is ... Karen from “Will and Grace” holding a martini and looking at the camera with a look that simply says, “you’re both morons.”
Are there far-left Gen X’ers and far right Gen X’ers out there screaming about whatever? Of course. But the vast majority of people I know are Gen X’ers, and the vast majority of us are busy raising a family and looking after their parents and working a job (plus a side hustle) and couldn’t care less about the world and it’s nonsense and … and isn’t that exactly what we need right now? Maybe a little less rancor?
Here’s a few examples of how a typical member of Gen X would handle some of the most pressing problems facing America today.
RACE: Can’t we just be cool with each other?
POLITICS: How about we put Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson in the White House? Everyone likes him. He seems reasonable.
CORONAVIRUS: Wear a mask? Yeah, cool.
And some less-pressing problems ...
WEED: Whatever. ABORTION: Whatever. GAY PEOPLE: Whatever. IMMIGRATION: Whatever. GUNS: Don’t shoot me, but whatever.
WHATEVER: Whatever. I mean, if you’re cool with it. Whatever.
To be clear: I’m not saying Gen X as a whole doesn’t care about anything, I’m just saying we don’t care about anything enough to get all worked about it because we’re busy trying to live our lives, and “not getting all worked up about it” certainly seems like a preferable way to go about doing things these days in a world that has gone loud. Everything these days is tribal, everyone has retreated to their corners, everything has gone black and white. Gen X? We are so grey, cloudy skies are jealous of us.
Seriously: Everyone has been so worked up about everything (and more) in the past few years, maybe it’s time to take the foot off the gas. Hell, maybe it’s time you all let us drive for a few minutes. In fact, maybe it’s time you all climbed into the back of the station wagon and played “Star Wars” while your seatbeltless mothers smoke a cigarette without rolling down the windows.
We are Gen X. Hear us roar, but only in a sarcastic way, and probably only after a few Zimas.