USA TODAY International Edition
TO BE OR NOT TO BE A FIRST LADY
There are lots of ways to do the job. Melania Trump might not do it at all.
After Donald Trump’s inauguration, his wife, Melania, will return home to their gilded penthouse in New York — leaving much of the work traditionally associated with the unpaid and often thankless role of first lady to her stepdaughter Ivanka.
Of course, the full- time nonjob of chief hostess and domestic diplomat has been evolving ever since Martha Washington held it. She complained in a letter to her niece that “I think I am more like a state prisoner than anything else, there is certain bounds set for me which I must not depart from.”
Asked during a joint appearance with Laura Bush in Tanzania whether she ever felt that way, Michelle Obama answered that though the “best job in the world” does have “prison elements,’’ she had nothing to complain about. Do I have to remind you of the outraged headlines that followed? Breitbart’s was “White House ‘ prison’: The Obamas love the perks, hate the office.”
It’s not hard to understand why Mrs. Trump might want to minimize our opportunities to analyze her hairstyle and travel at taxpayer expense, and whether any down- market shopping trips are for real or for show. DAUGHTERS, NIECES, IN- LAWS It’s not unprecedented for a first daughter to act as first lady, either: The daughters of Thomas Jefferson and John Tyler, Andrew Jackson’s niece and Martin Van Buren’s daughter- in- law all did so for widowed presidents. Zachary Taylor’s daughter filled in for her ailing mother, and James Buchanan’s niece did the honors for her bachelor uncle.
The public role of first lady has expanded considerably, though. And one of its chief functions has always been to divert and absorb some of the criticism that might otherwise accrue to the president. Much of the disparagement has been monumentally unfair.
London- born Louisa Adams, John Quincy Adams’ wife, was derided for having an English mother. Andrew Jackson’s wife, Rachel, whom he felt had been hounded to her death just before his inauguration, was briefly a bigamist, yes, but she hadn’t known her ex hadn’t gone through with their divorce.
Mary Todd Lincoln may have been a one- woman economic stimulus program, but she did not deserve to be accused of treason, or committed to an asylum by her only surviving child.
Eleanor Roosevelt was hated for her activism, and Mamie Eisenhower was considered too inactive. Admired as Jackie Kennedy was, the same clothes that made her a fashion icon also got her painted as a spendthrift. Nancy Reagan was dubbed “Queen Nancy” for loving couture, buying White House china, and other perceived sins that were only forgiven after she sang about them self- deprecatingly at a press dinner. When Hillary Clinton was first lady, both she and her husband were effectively accused of being serial killers. RETIRING THE ROLE The surprise is not that Melania Trump seems to be able to resist the allure of life in the White House, but that the de facto retirement of the role as we’ve known it has occasioned little conversation beyond the initial sniping about her decision to let her son finish the year in his school in Manhattan.
Doubtless that’s at least in part because her husband’s critics are already fully employed. Amid worries about his potential conflicts of interest and admiration for Russian dictator Vladimir Putin, it’s hard to get too excited about her whereabouts.
Whatever the reason, I’m glad Melania Trump has been able to signal she’ll stay off the public stage more than on it without exciting too much pushback. ( And if putting your son’s welfare first isn’t a good reason, then what was the feminist movement about?)
Moreover, I’m glad that she’s retiring the role itself, for now anyway. Michelle Obama certainly served admirably, focusing on what you’d think would have been the wildly uncontroversial issues of military families and proper nutrition. But the same cannot be said of her detractors, whose repeated racist potshots only made her “when they go low, we go high” response all the more impressive.
This is certainly not the reimagining of the job expected by those who were hoping to see Bill Clinton serving as “first gentleman.” But when, not if, a woman is elected president, her spouse will be able to thank all his predecessors for showing the many different ways his job can be done. And Mrs. Trump for showing that it doesn’t have to be done at all.