USA TODAY International Edition
‘Seinfeld,’ 30 years later: Yada yada yada
30 regifts from a beloved television show before you can even say Festivus
“Seinfeld” premiered on July 5, 1989, barely survived to get four more episodes almost a year later and – yada yada yada – is now a beloved hit celebrating its 30th anniversary on Friday. ❚ That’s quite a yada yada yada – “Seinfeld”-speak for a story-shortening technique that leaves out the biggest details. In this case, it’s a show that barely got on the air (as “The Seinfeld Chronicles”), was launched in the TV desert of summer and somehow became one of the biggest and most idiosyncratic sitcom hits of all time, scoring top ratings and 10 Emmys over nine seasons and 180 episodes. It remains widely available in syndication and via streaming.
So many “Seinfeld” catch words remain instantly recognizable more than 20 years after we left Jerry Seinfeld (a version of the comedian), Elaine Benes (Julia LouisDreyfus), George Costanza (Jason Alexander) and Cosmo Kramer (Michael Richards) jailed in the muchderided series finale that we decided to celebrate the 30th anniversary with 30 “Seinfeld” elements that remain relevant today:
1. George Costanza’s bogus Human Fund would be superpowered now with Facebook birthday donation
requests and GoFundMe solicitations.
2. Festivus for (a lot more of) the rest of us. Frank Costanza’s madeup, counter-Christmas celebration, complete with feats of strength and the airing of grievances, made son George miserable, but it has become an anti-holiday perennial every Dec. 23. 3. “No soup for you!” was the Soup Nazi’s favorite refrain. We all know that feeling today, except it’s
usually a recorded voice or a robot telling us no. (And maybe don’t call the offender a Nazi. That doesn’t play as well anymore.)
4. Elaine Benes’ nutritional holy grail, The Big Salad, is an aspirational eating goal in our health-conscious society. Wexler’s Deli in Santa Monica, California, has The Big Salad on its menu and other restaurants likely do, too.
5. Yada yada yada remains the gold standard of storytelling shorthand. While most of us yada to drop irrelevant details, “Seinfeld” employed the device to hide important, incriminating matters, as when George’s girlfriend appeared to cheat on him.
6. Babka is still a popular housewarming gift. (And cinnamon still can’t hold a candle to chocolate.)
7. A private bathroom at work is still the dream.
8. George’s mother and father, Estelle and Frank, are everyone’s crazy parents – times 10.
9. The morally questionable “Seinfeld” gang might face an even bigger shunning today if the quartet tried to take a handicap-designated parking spot. It was hardly the only time they behaved like jerks. Not that there’s anything wrong with that – as long as it’s funny.
10. We still fight over parking spaces. Exhibit A: Alec Baldwin went to court in a parking- space rage case.
11. With all our advances in technology, we still can’t find our cars in a parking garage.
12. The chance of someone dying from toxic envelope glue, as George’s fiancée did, is much lower today because there’s so much electronic communication. Alas, wedding invitations, the cause of poor Susan’s demise, still go out via regular mail.
13. Go to any party and you’re likely to find a disciple of Elaine’s ungainly “little kicks” dancing style. They just may not know it.
14. George’s moronic gym coach nicknamed him Can’t-Stand-Ya. President Donald Trump has made disparaging nicknames his go-to for political insults.
15. Regifting started long before “Seinfeld” and continues long after, but the sitcom gets credit for popularizing this low-brow but very common habit and giving it a name.
16. “Get Out”: For Elaine, it was a surprised exclamation as she smacked whoever she was talking to in the chest. For Jordan Peele, it was an Oscar-winning 2017 horror film.
17. We still collect coffee-table books (even if they’re not about coffee tables or can be turned into coffee tables, as Kramer’s book could).
18. “Seinfeld” illustrated its brilliance by turning a boring wait for a table at a Chinese restaurant – truly a scene about nothing – into a comedic tour de force. We still wait for tables, although it’s not nearly as funny.
19. Kramerica Industries: Cosmo Kramer was way ahead of his time with his self-titled corporation, as we now live in an era where personal branding is everything.
20. Vandelay Industries: George created a company, too, but it was a phony one. The ardent truth shader would have thrived in our fact-optional society.
21. Jerry’s dentist, Dr. Tim Whatley, a minor figure, would go on – via alter ego Bryan Cranston – to become better known as a chemistry teacher/drug lord (“Breaking Bad”), a blacklisted screenwriter (“Trumbo”), LBJ (“All the Way”) and a messianic TV anchor (“Network”).
22. To this day, a Junior Mint is “chocolate, it’s peppermint, it’s delicious,” as Kramer put it – but it’s still not recommended for use during surgery.
23. Kramer was the prototype of the hipster doofus, an urban species about as likely to be eradicated as the cockroach.
24. Elaine’s Urban Sombrero concept would be just as big a loser today as it was when it bombed in the J. Peterman catalog – maybe bigger.
25. Cellist Yo-Yo Ma, whose name Kramer blurted out after being kicked in the head, remains a world-renowned musician.
26. Double-dipping a chip? Still a nono!
27. The Moops, George’s bone-headed interpretation of a Trivial Pursuit answer, remains a popular team name in pub trivia contests throughout the country.
28. Schmoopie: Sappy nicknames for significant others will always be with us, whether we like it (some do) or not (many more don’t).
29. Confession: We can’t quite figure out how these other terms remain relevant - except they still make us laugh. So, please enjoy a chuckle over memories of the Puffy Shirt, Master of My Domain, Shrinkage, Marble Rye, Spongeworthy and all those Talkers, Close, Low and High.
30. Finally, Frank Costanza’s allegedly soothing mantra didn’t calm him down but it may bring us a little peace in these crazy times. All together, everyone: “Serenity Now!”