USA TODAY International Edition
Simone Biles gets real in Vogue cover story
Simone Biles was “very depressed” in the months before she acknowledged that she, too, had been abused by Larry Nassar, able to do little more than sleep.
In a frank interview with Vogue magazine, the Olympic gymnastics champion said she didn’t initially believe she had been abused. But she also felt if she admitted it, she’d be failing people.
“I felt like I knew, I just didn’t want to admit it to myself, that it had happened. Because I felt like, not that you’re supposed to be perfect, but I just felt like that’s what America wanted me to be – was perfect,” Biles told Vogue. “Because every time an American wins the Olympics, you’re like America’s sweetheart.
“So it’s like, ‘ How could this happen to America’s sweetheart?’ That’s how I felt – like I was letting other people down by this.”
The four- time Olympic gold medalist graces the cover of Vogue’s August edition. She’s believed to be the first gymnast to appear on the cover and one of only a few female athletes. Biles was photographed for the issue by renowned photographer Annie Leibovitz.
Biles does not often speak about Nassar’s abuse and when she does it’s often in pointed fashion to hold USA Gymnastics, the U. S. Olympic and Paralympic Committee or the FBI accountable. The FBI waited almost a year to investigate a report from USA Gymnastics that Nassar was abusing gymnasts, and the federation and the USOPC did not say anything publicly during that time.
Nassar’s abuse became public in September 2016, in a story by The Indianapolis Star. More than 350 girls and young women have said they were abused by the longtime team physician for USA Gymnastics and Michigan State, often under the guise of medical treatment. He is serving an effective life sentence for federal and state charges.
After the Nassar news broke, Biles and her mother, Nellie, said she refused to even discuss it with her family. But she found herself on edge, having “really bad anxiety about nothing.” When she moved out of her parents’ house in the summer of 2017, she said she was “very depressed.”
“At one point I slept so much because, for me, it was the closest thing to death without harming myself. It was an escape from all of my thoughts, from the world, from what I was dealing with. It was a really dark time.”
Biles came forward in January 2018, after friend and U. S. teammate Maggie Nichols acknowledged she was the first gymnast whose abuse was reported to USA Gymnastics. Her coach had overheard Nichols and others talking about Nassar’s treatments and how they’d made them “uncomfortable.”
“It was a weight that I carried so heavily on my chest, so I felt like, if I shared it with people, then it would be a relief for me,” Biles told Vogue. “And I knew that by sharing my story, I would help other survivors feel comfortable and safe in coming forward.”
Because she is still competing, she’s been a powerful catalyst for change. It was her tweet about not wanting to return to the Karolyi ranch that made USA Gymnastics abandon the center it had used for national team training camps for 20 years. Her criticisms of USA Gymnastics CEOs Kerry Perry and Mary Bono led to their ousters.