USA TODAY International Edition
‘ Ambulance’ puts logic on life support
Spoiler alert: This story discusses preposterous moments throughout “Ambulance.”
Director Michael Bay’s “Ambulance” can be an insanely gratifying wild ride that frees viewers from ever pondering, “Did this really happen?”
It most certainly did not.
The fantastically far- fetched film ( now in theaters) features two brothers, Danny and Will Sharp ( Jake Gyllenhaal and Yahya Abdul- Mateen II), who escape a botched $ 32 million Los Angeles bank heist by hijacking an ambulance carrying a wounded police officer and the paramedic ( Eiza Gonzalez) who’s fighting to save his life.
In real life, police chases with stolen ambulances have happened, including a 40- mile police pursuit in 2018. “Ambulance” also features accurate law- enforcement jargon and procedures, thanks to Bay’s reliance on police officials as technical consultants.
Pretty much the rest is utter, unrestrained Bayhem. We’ve whittled down our five craziest moments:
There’s an emergency, first- time ambulance spleen operation
Any list of “did that just happen?” moments must feature the spleen operation performed by first- time surgeon Cam Thompson ( Gonzalez), with an assist by Will, who discovers a hidden bullet wound that’s making her police officer bleed out. With limited surgical equipment and no anesthesia, Will has to wallop the patient to keep him from waking up in a panic mid- procedure.
Cam receives instructions in a video call with her surgeon ex- boyfriend ( Andy Favreau). Cam nails it with a MacGyver flourish, closing the wound with her hair clip when the spleen bursts.
Later, the officer asks, “Was your hand in my stomach?” Yes, officer, it was.
The helicopters buzz shooting suspects, burst through bridges
The LAPD Air Support gets gnarly chasing the ambulance during the 51mile cement section of the Los Angeles River. The two Airbus H125 helicopters fly 5 to 10 feet above the basin and swoop under the familiar arches of the bridges, with about 15 to 50 feet between them.
Then the helicopters divebomb the ambulance, with Danny leaning out the
window firing at them.
The impossible scene is pulled off using two helicopter stunt pilots, Fred North and Ben Skorstad.
Longtime Bay consultant and LAPD veteran Jamie McBride says he pointed out that LAPD copters would never fly that low and never under bridges, or so close to one another. “Michael values his advisers,” says McBride.
“And he also lets you know, ‘ Hey, I’m making a movie!’”
Police chief calls off a close pursuit due to flatulent dog
Captain Monroe ( Garret Dillahunt),
leading the LAPD’s Special Investigation Section unit, calls off an especially tight chase of the fleeing ambulance after he learns that his 200- pound, flatulent mastiff Nitro is in the back of the lead pursuing police car.
“Fall back,” Monroe orders when he learns that Nitro, who was supposed to be transported home on his day off, is in the middle of the melee.
True parts of the scene: Nitro is adorable, and mastiffs are known for their flatulence.
Bay would know: It’s his dog, Nitro Zeus, playing the canine role in a charming breakout performance.
Snipers are ordered to take out the drivers on the highway
There’s real- time pressure to end the ambulance chase, which is aired on every TV station, even by Los Angeles’ liberal mayor. Monroe orders police snipers to take out Danny and Will – while they are driving on a secluded highway with Cam in the back of the ambulance.
The duo is in the steady snipers’ cross hairs when Monroe discovers his injured officer somehow survived his surgery. He calls off the strike.
Craziest death: Shooter explodes into ambulance windshield
Danny hatches a plan with a gang leader to meet under a bridge with more stolen ambulances and then drive them out to confuse the police. Great plan, despite the idea to paint their ambulance bright green. It all goes downhill from there, and the gang turns on Danny and Will. One member tries to take out the moving ambulance from the front with a handgun but is blown skyward by an errant grenade shot lobbed by a colleague.
His final resting place is midway through the windshield of the speeding ambulance. Will pushes the casualty aside and drives on.