Men need to recognize, speak out for victims
LETTERS LETTERS@USATODAY.COM
I can’t remember the first time I was sexually harassed. I recall being in elementary school and hearing a friend’s older sister talk about her experiences, and I recall feeling uncomfortable but not surprised. It had already been deeply ingrained in me that my impending harassment was a matter of “when” and not “if.”
I would, like most women, go on to be harassed countless times in my life, as well as experience less frequent but far more devastating acts of sexual assault. When I woke up on Monday to a Facebook feed full of “me, too” (indicating the person had experienced sexual harassment and/ or assault), I wasn’t surprised. I was just tired. Tired of trying to prove that this is an issue to men who aren’t willing to turn the lens inward and acknowledge the degree to which they are the problem. If you are a man who just woke up to a similar series of status updates, look at yourself. Look at your friends. Know that there is no way that so many of your friends have been victimized without the men you know acting as perpetrators. Sexual assault isn’t limited to dark alleys and skeezy bars. It happens at the parties you throw and the dates you go on. You need to do more to recognize these experiences and to call them out when you see them happening. Find advocacy groups, get a therapist, speak out and fix what you are doing, because what you are doing is not enough. Rex Lee
Washington, D.C.
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The problem is what a lot of women call sexual harassment is actually just flirting. Women expect men to make the first move, and then they’re offended if they’re approached by a man who doesn’t meet their standards. Women play hard to get and force guys to aggressively pursue them and then they call it sexual harassment. Women are just as dangerous.
Frederick Appleton
I’m one of the women saying “me, too.” I wish I had known exactly what to do when I was 15 and fondled by a medical doctor alone in his examining room. If someone thinks that was flirting, you need your head examined. Emily Adams
TWITTER @USATOPINION
We asked our followers what men and women could be doing to reduce sexual harassment or assault.
By acknowledging assault is real, in places like the military and college campuses, and that consequences will be enforced. @rudolphellen1
The U.S. as a whole should be focusing much more on prevention through truthful and comprehensive sexual education. @alicialc1
Abusers should learn to keep their hands to themselves. Abused should stop feeling guilty and speak out, as soon as it happens @ReIndiAnnaJones
We need to teach all young people to value and respect others, and discipline the ones who struggle with this. This will continue until we have a generation of children who respect people and aren’t taught that others’ value is skin deep. @Cholie43
Demand longer sentences for sexual assaulters/predators. End the privileged sex predator tolerance mentality. Indict and convict the president for this behavior. @JHMorrow3
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