Is your sweetie a big spender?
Take our financial-compatibility quiz.
Valentine’s Day is Feb. 14, so chances are you’re thinking more about romance than finance.
But money issues can break up even the happiest of couples. After all, studies show that 70% of couples that divorce had major arguments about finances.
So this Valentine’s Day, don’t just focus on flowers, gifts or sexual compatibility, if you want your relationship to last forever, strive for fiscal harmony too.
But how do you know if your money habits and views are in sync with your partner’s?
The way you handle three crucial topics — credit, cash and communication — is very revealing.
Take this Valentine’s Day Money Quiz to find out how financially compatible you are with your mate — and to learn how to get on the same page when it comes to money matters.
Question No. 1: Do you know your mate’s credit score?
Why it matters: Roughly 15 million Americans in serious relationships admit to committing financial infidelity, according to a 2018 poll from Credit Cards.com. That means people are keeping money secrets and purposely withholding critical information from their partners — such as income, credit score or the existence of credit cards and bank accounts.
Such financial infidelity can signal mistrust. It can also spell serious trouble for your relationship if you get busted, since one-third of those polled by CreditCards.com also said financial infidelity was worse than a sexually unfaithful partner.
Question No. 2: Is your credit score similar to your partner’s?
Why it matters: According to research from the Federal Reserve, people with high credit scores are more likely to commit to a relationship, and when they do, the relationship is more likely to last.
How do they know this? Fed researchers scoured the credit histories of 12 million U.S. consumers, identified their romantic partners, and then tracked their unions and breakups over a 15-year period.
But here’s another surprising finding from the Fed: Having similar credit scores also had a positive effect. Individuals with similar scores, even if they weren’t especially high, stayed together longer than those with very different scores. Credit tip: Commit to full disclosure with your mate by checking your credit scores together. You can do it free, and get monthly tips on boosting each of your scores, at CreditSesame.com.
Question No. 3: Would you delay your Valentine’s Day celebration until Feb. 15th — or even later — just to save money?
Why it matters: There’s a lot of social and financial pressure on couples around Valentine’s Day. So not everyone is willing to put off gift giving, going out for a nice meal, taking a romantic trip or even getting engaged on the big day.
But a surprisingly high number of people (39% of couples) celebrate Valentine’s Day on the day after, in order to save money, a study from Finder.com has revealed. Millennials are most likely to use this savings hack; nearly half of them delay their Valentine’s Day celebrations as a way to cut costs.
You and your romantic partner’s approach to spending and saving money is a strong signal of how financially compatible you are.
Question No. 4: Are you a spender and your lover a saver (or vice versa)?
Why it matters: It’s actually quite common for financial opposites to attract. But those differences don’t mean the relationship is doomed or that you’re destined to have constant money battles — as long as you’re both willing to compromise.
Cash tip: Try using cash more often than credit cards to fund your lifestyle. Utah State University researcher Jeffrey Dew says thrifty couples who don’t overspend tend to be the happiest of all, while those in debt have lower marriage satisfaction.
Question No. 5: Do you and your partner often discuss routine money goals (like budgeting, spending or saving for retirement)?
Why it matters: Open communication is a strong sign of a healthy relationship. According to an Ameriprise Financial study, among happy couples, most talk about and agree on financial goals and shared responsibilities. In fact, 68% of these happy couples rate their communication on financial matters as good or perfect.
Question No. 6: Do you and your partner have a financial “safe word?”
Why it matters: Many of us have heard about “safe words” in the bedroom. But if things get too heated when you discuss money matters, having a safe word or phrase can help during financial conversations too.
Two basic examples: Saying “please stop” or “let’s regroup,” can help establish boundaries or can convey that one or both of you needs to cool down and talk later.
The point is to maintain respect for one another — even if you disagree — and to avoid having every financial conversation become a dispute about something. Communication tip: If it’s too hard to talk to your spouse about money, or your conversations often wind up in an argument, a third-party financial counselor, coach or trusted adviser can help.