Kentucky Derby week
Top story lines, advice on how to be an insider
LOUISVILLE – Even if this is your first Kentucky Derby, there’s no need to feel lost in conversations at Churchill Downs.
The Courier-Journal is here to help you fake it until you make it with tips on how to act like a Derby insider, even when you aren’t one:
Know a buzz horse
Every year, there are a couple of horses, besides the favorite, getting a lot of buzz and seen by bettors as possible sleepers.
Last year’s race was fairly wide open, with many horses cropping up in prerace discussions as possible contenders to be among the first to cross the finish line. The eventual winner, Always Dreaming, was among the horses getting a lot of buzz despite Classic Empire often being seen as the favorite.
The horses that placed second and third in 2017, Lookin at Lee and Battle of Midway, had longer odds and were seen by some as “wiseguy” picks. (A wiseguy horse is one that’s picked by contrarians to upset the favorites.)
Three years ago, the massive horse Dortmund, who ended up in third place, got a lot of buzz, in large part because he stood 17 hands high. (By the way, a hand is 4 inches, and horses are measured from the ground to the withers, which is where the neck joins the body.)
Complain about tourists
Bemoan how every year it’s more and more difficult to get around or get a table at a restaurant. Then lean in and conspiratorially whisper about how you have a friend nearby who lets you park in their driveway or how you took a pedi-cab to Churchill Downs to avoid the mess.
Reminisce about Secretariat’s, Citation’s runs
If you don’t know those horses and key information about their races, you don’t know Derby. Secretariat, the 99th Derby winner who won in 1973, was the first Triple Crown winner in 25 years. Secretariat’s time of 1:592⁄ remains the record
5 for the Derby and for Churchill Downs to this day. Come on, a Disney movie was made about this horse.
Citation is also arguably one of the best racehorses in history. In
1948, he became the eighth Triple Crown winner and has a modern-era record of 16 consecutive victories.
Make sure to drop both these horses’ names liberally in conversations at Churchill Downs. And don’t make the mistake of dropping the names of Seabiscuit or Man o’ War; neither of those legendary horses ever ran in the Kentucky Derby (although Man o’ War’s son War Admiral did run, and win, the Kentucky Derby and later the Triple Crown).
Eschew the mint julep
Yes, the mint julep is synonymous with the Kentucky Derby. No one will judge you if you have one or a few. But some locals tend to skip these sugary drinks at Churchill Downs and opt instead for other drinks. Instead, consider using a Hunter S. Thompson reference and ordering a double Old Fitz on ice. Or pick some other bourbon cocktail.
Brag about American Pharoah
Casually look at the field of horses and comment on how none of them could compete with American Pharoah. The Kentucky Derby winner from three years ago has retired from his racing career but horsemen are still bemoaning the loss to the sport. American Pharoah won the first Triple Crown in 37 years.
If you can, manage to drop a story about how you watched American Pharoah tear up the track at some race a few years ago.
Comment on track conditions
The weather can affect the dirt track at Churchill Downs. Show off your knowledge of racing by simply looking outside.
If it’s warm and sunny out, talk about how fast the track is; if it’s wet out, talk about how sloppy the track is and how that will help the frontrunners.
At a loss? Repeat this phrase: “I don’t know if he can get the distance.”
If the people around you have gotten into an in-depth discussion about the merits of different horses and you’re feeling out of your depth, toss out this key phrase. Repeat as often as necessary.
The Kentucky Derby is a 11⁄ 4- mile race, which is longer than any prep race. So these horses are generally untested at this length, meaning this key phrase could work for any of these horses and make you sound like you know what you’re talking about.