How to talk about tragedy
Parents should be prepared for their kids’ questions.
Trying to reassure children after a national tragedy such as a school shooting is never easy for parents.
There will never be an explanation good enough to make sense of such violence and cruelty.
And the truth is, this kind of incident could happen again.
Children are likely to have questions, and it’s best for parents to be prepared.
REMEMBER THE FOUR S’s
Robbie Adler-Tapia, an Arizonabased psychologist, offered these four tips for talking to children about violence and tragedy.
Solace
Provide comfort and consolation for any emotions and fears to help kids feel secure.
Tip: Don’t tell them not to feel scared or anxious. Let them feel their emotions. Be honest about your emotions as well, but remain calm.
Security
Take steps to help children feel safe and protected. As soon as possible, get them to a safe location where they feel protected by people they can depend on.
Tip: Try to maintain your regular routine. As creatures of habit, people tend to view schedules as a safety net.
Service
Provide the essential services to meet basic needs.
Tip: If children have questions, let them ask. Answer the questions truthfully but without unnecessarily gruesome details. Children may not have enough life experience to know how to cope with the overwhelming nature of national tragedies.
Support
If the children are victims, give them a post-incident safety period to rest and heal.
Tip: Understand that it’s normal for children to be affected by tragedies. If your kids’ behavior changes for a prolonged period of time, however, it is best to consult with your doctor.