Customer service: It still exists!

I promise this is not a paid advertisement. I like to share the good and bad with you, and since I’m human, I tend to get cranky and write about the bad stuff a little too often. So somewhere near the end of this column, I will lavish great praise on a company for the most amazing customer service I have ever received.

I’ve complained about the state of customer service in the world, and generally it’s not good. I switched internet providers because a certain company wrote the book on bad service.

When I experienced online outages, I would call their customer service line. After pressing 1, then 3, then 7, and finally 3 again, someone named “Bob” with a thick foreign accent would tell me if I needed assistance, I could go to their website. That would be great, except for one thing. If I could go online, I wouldn’t have called in the first place!

Now that I have switched to a better provider, the old one floods my mailbox with invitations for me to “come back.” They promise low rates, great service, candy and flowers. Honestly, if they had paid any attention to me when I was their customer, I would have never left.

In-person customer service isn’t much better. How many of us have stood in line at a customer service counter that isn’t even staffed? How many times have you stood helpless in a giant store, where most of the employees are as clueless as you are, and managerial types do their best to avoid eye contact?

With all the customer service fails we experience on a regular basis, you can imagine my surprise when one company got it right.

One day, an item I had purchased online just stopped working. I tried plugging, unplugging, and standing on my head. Nothing worked. It was a cooling car seat cushion. You see, I had traded cars, and my old car had cloth seats. The newer one has leather. Hot, sticky leather. I saw a “cooling cushion,” which connects to the cigarette lighter, at a huge store. The label said it would keep my back, bottom, and legs cool.

Unfortunately, it didn’t work well, and when I tried to return it, they wouldn’t take it. I had not saved the original packaging.

I searched for a better one online, and found one on sale at The Sharper Image. This one worked great for about a month. Then it stopped.

The item had arrived in a large box, which I soon discarded. After it worked well for several weeks, I tossed the receipt too. I didn’t figure I would ever need it. Until now.

It only took one phone call. I called their customer service line, and much to my surprise, a human being who speaks English answered immediately. I told her the item stopped working, and that I no longer had the box or the receipt.

I was already dreading a trip to the UPS store, where I would surely have to spend money on another box and lots of bubble wrap, plus shipping.

Immediately, I was told not to worry. “It doesn’t work anymore?” the customer service rep asked. “Nope, it’s dead as a doornail,” I said. This, despite the fact I don’t own any doornails, nor do I have any proof of their recent demise.

“Well, just throw the old one away, and I’ll send you a new one,” she said. I thought I was hearing things. “Do what?” I asked. “Did you just tell me to throw the old one away?” She said, “Yep, just get rid of it. It’s not your fault it doesn’t work, it’s ours. You don’t need to send it back, I’ll get a new one on the way right now,” she said.

I’m pretty sure I fainted, but when I came to, out of sheer greed, I asked, “When do you think I will receive the new one?” Suddenly I had gone from an attitude of hoping they would accept my exchange, to “I know you’re doing me a huge favor, so can you speed it up?”

She said, “It shouldn’t take more than five business days.” Well, it’s hot, and I really didn’t want to wait that long, but I said, “That’s great, thank you very much.” She said, “Is there anything else I can do for you?” While I was on a roll, I thought about asking her to paint my house, but instead I thanked her and went about my business.

Less than 24 hours later, the FedEx truck pulled up to my house and delivered the replacement item. Yes, the very next day. No charge, no shipping, no trouble. Thank you Sharper Image. This is how it’s done. This is customer service.

David Carroll is from Chattanooga, Tenn. You may contact him at 900 Whitehall Road, Chattanooga, Tenn. 37405 or 3dc@ epbfi.com.