“If i matters to her, it matters to me”
My dear wife is many things. College educated, tech guru, great cook, runner of 5k races, and mother extra ordinaire. All of those are things that I have become familiar with and am used to.
But now I find myself listening to her as she spouts off entirely new things to me, words like “campaign” and “samples” and “brochures.”
My dear bride has become an Avon lady.
As a bit of a backdrop to my story, you should know that I have a long and emotionally complicated relationship with Avon. My grandmother and my mother were Avon ladies as well. My grandmother was some what of an Avon legend, always in the President’s Club. My mother, though, was a collector of all things Avon.
In other words, our house was filled with approximately ten million (give or take) designer bottles, knick-knacks, curios, etc. and come house cleaning day, each of those items had to be removed from their shelves, the shelves had to be dusted, and the items had to be put back.
What’s that, you say? Simply dust around them? Hahahahaha! No. Trying to fool my mother like that was as likely to succeed as convincing a drill instructor that everyone expressing their individuality is a good thing.
And now, years after my housekeeping trauma, I am being reintroduced to Avon. I have found that it is much different than the memories of my childhood. It seems they still sell makeup, but have also expanded into clothing, gifts, housewares, and much more.
For the record, I am just about as interested in makeup, clothing, gifts, and housewares as I was in the ten million trinkets I had to dust around. But in spite of that I am enthusiastically (seriously, not making this up) learning all about her percentages, potential levels that she can rise to, special deals in each new campaign, the works. You see, while I am not at all interested in Avon for Avon’s sake, I am interested in my wife. And thus, if something matters to her, it matters to me...
Pay attention here, men. Philippians 2:4 says, “Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.” In other words, as commentator Albert Barnes puts this verse, “Do not let your care and attention be wholly absorbed by your own concerns.” Nowhere is this more of a needful admonition than when dealing with your wife.
The best marriages I have ever seen have been those in which the husband and wife take somewhat of an interest in what interests the other. The level each couple takes this to may be different, but the principle is a good one.
A dear friend of mine loves hunting. Once or twice a year his wife, who would rather stay in bed, gets up and goes with him. It helps her to understand it and makes it easier for her to intelligently talk about it with him.
One of my best friends, who never showed any particular interest in drama when we were growing up, now volunteers at local theaters, helping with costumes and lights and staging. You see, his daughter and wife love it, and so he has taken an interest in it as well.
And so I am re-learning this thing called Avon. I am celebrating with my wife each time she does well, and I am encouraging her when she does not do as well as she wanted to. I just hope and pray that when I stand before God he does not say, “Well done, good and faithful servant, enter thou into the joy of thy Lord. And by the way, since you come from an Avon family, I have already furnished your mansion with ten million knick-knacks for you to enjoy.”
Bo Wagner is pastor of the Cornerstone Baptist Church in Mooresboro, N.C., a widely traveled evangelist, and author of several books, including a kid’s fiction book about the Battle of Chickamauga, “Broken Brotherhood.” He can be emailed at 2knowhim@cbc-web.org.